Take joy in your trials

James 1:2-5

2 My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;

3 Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.

4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

This one is so very hard for me.  It is not that I don't want to be joyful, but sometimes I can't see myself out of the hole that I seem to be in.  You climb a mountain, only to find a bigger one waiting for you on the other side.  Sometimes, there really is joy, but often, my spirit only sees the difficulties. 
I can honestly say, that if I had to do it all over again, I would probably do most of the same things.  I might not wish those trials upon anyone else, but they have helped to mold me and shape me into the person that I am today.  If I changed those things, my question would be, would I somehow lose the essence of myself. 
I like the person that I have become most of the time.  I strive not to hurt others, I volunteer to help, I work hard at improving the lives of others.  I still do a lot wrong.  I don't want to sound perfect because I am not.  I still have days and hours where it takes every bit of my energy just to go to work, and when I come home, I can only fall into bed.  There is no strength left for anything else.  There are nights when I can't sleep.  There are times when the past reaches out and holds me tight in it's grip of "if only's and what if's".  Sometimes it gets overwhelming, yet when I look at the person I have become, I am grateful for my trials.  They gave me my strengths. 
I am not sure that I like working toward patience very much.  It always means more trials, but I would like to have patience in faith and understanding.  I would like to not need to know everything right this moment.  I would like to wait upon the Lord's time.  And so, although joy sometimes escapes me, I will look for it in all my temptations and short comings.  I believe that Heavenly Father sent us here to have joy.  He wants us to find that joy in the midst of whatever place we are in.  I don't believe that joy only comes in the life hereafter.  I think it is supposed to be for us, here, today.  
So today, I am going to find joy in the small moments.  In the things I don't want to take for granted.  Today, my cup will be full.    

It Starts With You

 

 

This one is hard for me to remember.  Sometimes, I feel like it is Someone Else's responsibility to make sure I am happy.  My head knows that is wrong, but my heart wants it to be true. 

I found a great quote yesterday that says:  "Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they never stopped to enjoy it!" 

That is very much me.  I don't stop and smell the roses as my husband would tell me.  I just kind of go along trying and failing to get everything done and make everyone else happy.  It hurts me when I can't make it happen!  I get so busy with everyone else, that I forget to take the time that I need for me.  

Fighting depression and anxiety is a constant struggle.  I want so much to BE happy, but I go about it in all the wrong ways.  I spend way too much time working and surviving and not nearly enough time sitting back and enjoying.  I focus on the getting there, instead of on the journey itself.

I think maybe, my priorities for happiness are just a little bit (OK, maybe a lot), mixed up.  I forget how things don't make us happy.  It really is about what I am feeling inside, and when I am too tired to even enjoy the fruits of my labors, how can I ever think to find happiness.  

So, here I am, taking a deep breath and moving on.  

Happiness seems so elusive when we are getting down and dirty with life.  Just when it seems that I will move forward, I sink into a hidden puddle and end up sliding back.  Life is unpredictable.  It is hard.  It is lonely, it is rough and rowdy and really, really messy.   But I also know that it is possible find those little, sparkling gems of happiness in the middle of the mud. 

I have to find them inside myself first.     It sounds so simple, but is in reality pretty hard.  I have to look past the darkness and find those bits and pieces that can bring me joy.  I have to live in the present moment, instead of the future and the past.  I have to let go and trust that everything is in His hands and that He has my back. 

I have to believe that I am lovable and worth loving.  I have to believe that I am worth some tiny spark of happiness.  I have to believe that there is good within myself. 

I have to take time and make time to be happy.      

Letting Go

 

I forget to find joy in the moment.  I have an entire laundry list of Should have's and could have's, but I really need to figure out how to burn that list and come up with all the things are really ARE. 

When I was young, I really wanted to be a doctor, but life stepped in and I became a mother instead.  I am not sorry for a single moment of not doctoring that happened.  I am sorry that that dream took me so very long to let go of.  I started going to school to be a nurse, but found myself in the position of being a single mother instead.  So, I went to work.  I have waited tables, been a nursing assistant, delivered papers, taken pictures, been an EMT and even been a telephone solicitor.  I have done anything and everything that I could to support my family and raise my children. 

But I have never let go of the should have's and could have's.  Perhaps it is time now. 

I love my EMT job.  It doesn't really pay, but it is truly a job of love.  I love being able to help people who are hurting and see direct results because I get them to the care they need.  I love my family.  I have been able to raise and love my children.  They have become adults that I can be proud of.  They are truly better than I have ever been, and that is all I could ever ask for.  I think that my life looks exactly how it is supposed to.  It might not be the way that I imagined it, but it is a life that I can celebrate.   

 

2 Nephi 2:25    Adam fell that men might be;
and men are, that they might have joy.

Heavenly Father did not send us here to be miserable.  He wants us to be happy.  He wants us to have joy.  He wants us to celebrate the good things in our lives.  He wants us to celebrate our blessings.  I love that He is mindful of our happiness.  I love that He wants us to be positive about our lives.  So today, I am going to trust that He knows exactly who I needed to be and that all these experiences shall be for my good. 
Today, I am letting go of the past and moving forward toward a new future. 
Today, I am going to find my joy. 

Joy in the Journey

This is one of my favorite quotes.  I am really working on it in my own life.  I can get so caught up in living, that I forget there is supposed to be joy in the things we do. 
Without going into a lot of detail, I have gone through some rough things in the past year.  I had someone today tell me that I seemed happier because someone else is not around to hurt me.  I think I am.  I just haven't realized how very difficult it is for me to be around people who suck the happiness right out of me. 
I am someone who always tries to do things for others.  I put myself last.  Usually only when I don't have any reserves left.  Even my councilor says that he doesn't want to see the old me again.  He is afraid that in spite of the amazing strides I have made this year, I will lose it as life reaches out and grips me by the throat once again.  I don't want that to happen. 
I am leaning that there are some things you cannot change.  There are people who are always going to take advantage of me.  There are people who just don't like me and aren't willing to give me a chance.  If I judge myself based on what all those other people think, I will go right back into the cycle of depression and anxiety that I have worked so very hard to get out of. 
I know that I focus so much on serving, I forget to serve myself.  It is really a struggle for me because I end up feeling selfish when I fight for something that I want badly.  I hate feeling selfish.  I really want to help others.  I just run out of energy when I don't do something for myself every once in a while. 
So today, I am going to try harder to find joy in my own journey.  It may be hard, but it is mine.  It may not be exactly what I planned on, but it is beautiful in it's own way.  May we all remember that the finish line is very far away, and Heavenly Father never intended for us to suffer through life without any joy.  We might have to walk between sorrows to find it, but there is always, always joy in our journey. 

Our Job is to Love

Why is it so hard to give those around us the benefit of the doubt?  Why do we compare ourselves to others?  I have been thinking about that one a lot.  I am pretty good about not judging those around me, but not so good about not judging myself, or even my children. 
I seem to live in a place where people decide they are successful or unsuccessful based on the worthiness of their children, or their own professed worthiness.  Like having kids that totally follow the straight and narrow, would make me any better of a person, or a mother. 
Women talk about the things their children do.  How good they are, how righteous they are, how they have done everything right in their lives.  They talk about how all 12 of their children have been to the temple and hold callings.  It is very hard for me to not compare my struggles with their righteousness. 
I have children who have chosen different paths in their lives.  They don't follow the same things that I do.  They have made mistakes.  They have struggled.  They have cried.  They have failed and some of them have overcome.  Some of them are still working on that.  I also have children who have chosen to live good lives, righteous lives.  Who work hard to serve others and who make good choices.  I am proud of every single one of them.  I love each one and rejoice in the things they have accomplished and continue to accomplish. 
I am grateful for the lessons they have taught me.  I am also grateful to my son in laws and my daughter in law for the way they treat my children and the love they have for them.  No matter what their choices have been, each and every one of them deserve love and kindness. 
Sometimes, I feel like I should love the good ones more.  But as a mother, I have learned that I love them all.  Good choices or bad.  Those young adults and teens mean the world to me.  I am equally in love with the people that I know they are.  The funny thing (or not so funny) is that I don't judge them for their mistakes, I judge myself.  I compare myself to those families whose children have not had the struggles that mine have had.  I can't help feeling like there must be something wrong with me that my children would make those decisions, or have those things happen to them in their lives.  No matter how hard I have tried, bad things happen.  No matter how much I pray, bad things happen.  No matter what choices I make, bad things still happen.  I have had to learn that Heavenly Father does not take away anyone's free agency.  None of us really choose what happens to us, but we all get to choose how we react to the things that others bad decisions bring into our lives. 
We are each one of us unique and loved and needed and wanted and cared for.  Each one of us is a rare gift to the world around us.  Let us work harder on not stealing the joy that being unique can bring into our own life as well as the lives of those around us.  Don't steal joy that I know Heavenly Father takes in each one of us.  We are unique for a reason.  Sometimes, it is that very uniqueness that brings joy into the life of someone else. 
To each one of my children and children-in-law, I love you.  You are amazing!!!  You are everything I could have ever hoped for and dreamed of.  You are exactly who I want you to be.  I love you dearly, in all your imperfections and insecurities.  I admire you spunk, independence, and perseverance.   You are Sons and Daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves you more than you can ever imagine. 
You are mine on loan, but you are His for eternity. 

Sabbath Day Scribblings - You are a Child of God

John 13:34-35
34  A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

 35  By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.

 

 

Gratitude Each Day

"No matter our circumstances, 

no matter our challenges or trials, 

there is something in each day 

to embrace and cherish. 

There is something in each day 

that can bring gratitude and joy 

if only we will see and appreciate it".  Deiter F. Uchtdorf

 

This man is one of my favorite speakers.  He always seems to talk about the things that I need to know and be aware of.  It is easy for me to become "lost" in my trials and circumstances.  It is easy for me to focus on the hard things to the exclusion of all else. 

One of the things I am working very hard on right now is focusing on the joys that are abundant in my life.  I know they are there.  I know they are all around me.  I get to choose exactly what it is that I am going to embrace and cherish.  I am exhausted with embracing the bad.  I am choosing to focus on the things in my life that I have to be grateful for. 

I even started counseling again.  This was a hard decision for me as I keep telling myself that I "should" be better.  I found a new therapist who gives me homework.  (Yep, at my age, I am doing homework again!)  I am learning more about myself and my relationships that I ever thought possible.  I am even learning that I can change.  I can overcome.  I can be who I was always meant to be.  That is my joy today.  I can embrace and cherish the good.  I can find gratitude through the sorrows.

I can become like HIM.  

 

 

Becoming Like Him - Day 30 - First

For my 31 days of writing, I am linking up over at Heading Home and over at the Nester. There are several of us that are taking the 31 day writing challenge. Kate has suggested that we spend 31 days of Five minute writing. You can use the prompts or write about anything you would like, you just need to write.

I am sharing my journey for 31 days as I strive to become more like Him. My prayer is that you can find hope and peace in my words.

Today the Prompt is:  

FIRST

START

For me, one of the ways that I strive to become most like Him is in my family life.  I make lots of mistakes, but I keep working on it and I love my family absolutely and unconditionally.  I don't get enough time with each of them, but I want them to know how much they mean to me as well as to their Heavenly Father.  

This is your very first day of being 16.  Happy birthday my sweet girl!  The very first time I saw you, I knew I loved you.  You opened your one pirate eye and looked right at me.  You melted my heart.  It filled right up with a love that never goes away, no matter what happens.  I want you to know that I will stand by your side and love you.  I will cherish you, sooth your hurts, and help you through your pain.  I know that it is hard to be in the middle.  And you are right in the middle of the final three girls.  You  have had to endure older siblings and a younger sister.  You have had to find your place in an already crowded world.  

The first time I heard you cry, I wanted to fix it.  But I couldn't.  You had a hard time adjusting to the busy place that we call home.  I carried you everywhere, until your dad got home.  From the first time he saw you, you became his.  He would take you outside and softly bounce you on the trampoline until you fell asleep in his arms.  

We were there for all your big firsts.  Your first smile was for daddy.  You first step was between our arms.  Your first soccer game and your first day of school.  We loved you through it all.  Suddenly, you are 16 and most definitely a young woman now.  You had your first permit and your first day of driving.  You are working on getting your first driver's license.  How did time fly so quickly?  You have had your first boyfriend and you are looking forward to your first date.  

I love your laugh.  I could listen to that all day long.  It makes me happy.  You might not be my first daughter, but you are loved as if you were.  You have a place in my heart that only is for you.  There is no competition in our family my sweet daughter, there is only love, and plenty of firsts for you to try.  

STOP

Becoming Like Him - Day 20 - Fear

For my 31 days of writing, I am linking up over at Heading Home and over at the Nester. There are several of us that are taking the 31 day writing challenge. Kate has suggested that we spend 31 days of Five minute writing. You can use the prompts or write about anything you would like, you just need to write.

I am sharing my journey for 31 days as I strive to become more like Him. My prayer is that you can find hope and peace in my words.

Fears are stories

We tell ourselves.

Today's Prompt is:

FEAR

START

There have been so many things that I have been afraid of.  Sometimes, it is what people think and what they believe.  Sometimes it is what might be happening or being humiliated.  I love the quote above about fear because I have come to find that most fears are actually things that might not come true.  I worry more about the "what if's" than about what is real.
This week, I tried something new.  I put aside my fear of "what if it looks really bad" and took a painting class.  It is only for one evening, and you can choose the night you want to go and the painting that you want to do.  I chose this one!  I know, it doesn't look like much yet, but I did the entire thing by myself.  The teacher showed us the strokes on his painting and I painted mine in about 3 and 1/2 hours.  I was so afraid it would be worse than everyone else's.  I was so afraid that I couldn't do it.  But I did.

This is me, filling in the background on the black and just painting.  I could not believe that it was so much fun!  How long have I denied myself chances to achieve simply because I had too much fear to even try.  Yesterday, I could never have imagined that I could ever do this.  Today I know I can.  

I am planning on doing this once a month for awhile.  It was so much fun and even if it is not perfect, I can at least tell what it is supposed to be.  That is a start, and an accomplishment.  I did something today that was beyond my fear.  As I am seeking to become more like Him, it makes me wonder how many things have held me back because I was too afraid to even try.  He is the one who gave us talents to use and enjoy.  He is the one who sends us blessings and tender mercies to share with others.  As I strive to become more like Him, I am also seeking to overcome my fears and to nurture the gifts that He has given me.

STOP

Wordless Wednesday - I'm A Big Girl Now!

A single photo 

– no words –

capturing a moment from our lives.

A simple, special, extraordinary moment.

A moment

I want to pause, savor and remember.

A moment

that brings a smile to my lips, 

and joy to my heart.

A Piece of Cake

As I've grown older I've learned: 

that pleasing everyone is impossible, 

but making them mad is a piece of cake!

I have a knack for doing things to annoy others. I suppose that is something that we can all say to one degree or another. I always wanted everyone to be happy, to like me, to want to be around me. I suppose that you could say that I wanted to be "popular". I have learned as I have gotten older, that it is not my job to make others happy. It is not my job to be popular. I am however, supposed to be the best that I am capable of being.  One of my favorite scriptures can be found in John, in the New Testament:

John 16:22   And ye now therefore have sorrow: but I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice, and your joy no man taketh from you.

 I take this as a promise from the Lord, that although we have sorrow here upon the earth, there will come a day when we will rejoice, when we will have joy.  We all, each of us, go through times of sorrow.  We cannot escape them.  Those times will mold us and shape us and help us to appreciate all the blessings that we are really given.  I find that those times help me to keep everything in the proper perspective.
None of us want sorrow or pain.  Most of us don't like change.  Many times we only see the here and now and not the bigger picture that is our life.  But, if I am honest with myself, I know that those trials are just as important in my development as are the joys.  I just don't like them as much!  So today, I am going to be grateful for the silly, happy, crazy times.  I am going to be grateful for the love of family and the shelter of home.  I am join to be grateful that I can't please everyone, because I know that I really can please Him.
And in that joy, my heart is full.

The Perfect Mother

There is no one perfect way

to be a good mother.

Each situation is unique.

Each mother has different challenges,

different skills and abilities,

and certainly, different children....

What matters most is that a mother

loves

her children

deeply.

Elder M. Russel Ballard

For a few days, I want to talk about real mothering.  Not the kind that you think you ought to do, but really, the kind that we all manage to do.  We live in a society that is filled with photoshopped perfection.  Things that seem real but aren't.  Songs that are sung over and over with bits taken here and there until we have what seems like a perfect whole.  

Being a mother is hard.  It is work.  It is joy.  It is rewarding.  It is still so very, very hard.  

There is the fussy times, the whining time, the tantrum times, the teenage times, the moody times, the joyous times, the laughter, the fun, the picnics, the hikes, the playing, the chores, the cleaning, the family.  

Being a perfect mother is a job that lives in our dreams.  We compare ourselves to this woman so much, that we start to believe more and more, how much we are lacking.  The perfect mother is in our heads, and we really need her to step out of there for awhile.  

I am not perfect.  I tried really hard for a long time and failed miserably, but the one area that I think I have succeeded in is that my children know they are loved.  Every single one of them.  They might not understand how much, or what I am willing to go through for them.  They might not know what I have given up and what I have gained because of them.  But every single one of the has no doubt that they have always been loved.  

I remember the moment when they were each put in my arms and I held them and looked into their sweet baby eyes and smelled their hair and counted their fingers and toes.  I remember how much that small little miracle meant to me.  They have grown since them and many have their own miracles.  I love how your heart just opens up to include them right inside.  I love how part of you is always, always with them, even if they don't know it.  

I love my children, in all the amazing, miraculous moments; through all the trials and heartache and the hurt and sad.  We walk together into the love; and that has always been enough for me.  

Trouble Ahead

"Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and repeat to yourself, 

the most comforting world of all, 

this too shall pass".  

Ann Landers

Trouble comes and goes in my life.  Indeed, I can pretty much say that it shadows me constantly.  As soon as I get one problem taken care of, two or three more pop up to say "hello".  I have a hard time accepting trouble as inevitable.  I really have been guilty of thinking if I was only a better person than I would not have so many trials.  If I only made better decisions or if I didn't make so many mistakes, everything would work out better.  

This is especially true when my problems involve my kids (grown or not).  This weekend, we had family time.  Many members of my family came up the mountain to have a wild and crazy time with their mom and grandma for my birthday.  I worry constantly about my children.  Especially when they make choices that can cause them harm.  It can be very hard for me to "stay out of their business".  Yet, they love me, even when I tease them unmercifully and try and get them to go back to church, they still love me.  We have had some amazing times together.  

I can honestly say that I would not go back and change anything.  Well, I would try and spend more time with them, but otherwise, the troubles are what brought us so very close together.  The years throwing papers and taking pictures.  All the traveling and stopping at, Every.  Single.  Monument.  Along the way.  

I might not like the problems, but I love the memories.  I know that the good times pass and so do the bad ones.  Sometimes I get so focused on the moment I am currently in,  that I forget that the moment will pass.  I forget that the bad things will also pass.  Time will go by and I will learn what I need to know.   Eternity beacons me onward.  It is comforting to know that the difficulties will pass away.  They will not last longer than I can bear.  Joy, yes joy, cometh in the morning.    

Talking about our problems

I saw this one and really needed it today (and probably for awhile now).  I think that I have been in a rut lately.  I have been so focused on the problems that I am having that I have not even paid attention to all the joys that my Heavenly Father continues to give me.  Looking at our problems all the time brings only the problems to the front of our minds.  It is, indeed, my greatest addiction.  It can be so overwhelming to me, that when someone I care about is having great problems, I feel them as if they were my own.  I worry about them, I can't sleep.  They consume me.

This is not healthy.  I don't want to feel like everything is my responsibility and my worry.  I need to let go of some of it because it is just too heavy for me to carry on my own.  So, this is my time to break the habit of talking only about problems.  This is my moment to discover joy again.  To feel it in my heart, to discover it as a new friend.  This is my chance to change my habits and find my joy.
I want my heart to know and appreciate the good things around me.  I am most richly blessed.

...but behold, my joy is full, 

yea, my heart is brim with joy, 

and I will rejoice in my God.  

(Alma 26:11)

The Examples in Nature

"Nature is made to conspire with spirit to emancipate us".  

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Spring is finally here.  My irises are waving their purple heads in delight.  I am walking every morning for about three miles and really enjoying the sights and sounds.  The birds are chirping all over and the squirrels are chattering in the trees.  Nature is refreshing, full of vision and the promise of things to come.  I love the warmer weather and all the animals that are taking part in the beautiful morning light. 
This past year has been hard for me.  I have gone through a stage of pretty severe depression.  I know it is something that comes off and on in my life, but I really wasn't prepared for it to knock me down like it did.  I found myself having difficulties just getting out of bed in the morning.  I made myself go to work.  I made myself participate.  But my heart wasn't in it.
Sometimes, we just have to put our feet on the floor, get dressed and keep going.  One step at a time, one moment at a time, one day at a time.  Eventually, we start to notice the things around us and to feel content.  I love the feeling of taking a deep breath in and letting it out.  Of letting go of the past and inhaling the future.  I love knowing that change can be good.
It is amazing to me how close to my Heavenly Father I feel when I take myself out into the world around me.  I love the escape of a rich spring day in the forest.  The beauty of the leaves on the trees and the flowers in the meadow.  I love the wind as it whispers in the branches and the sun as it warms my limbs.  I love learning that joy really will come.
Sometimes, the night seems long and dreary, but the morning light will come.  Time does pass, hearts mend, feelings change, happiness blossoms like the first flower of spring, and joy cometh in the morning.

Psalms 30:2, 5
2. O Lord my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me.
5. For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

Writer's Workshop - Joy in the Journey

Choose a prompt, post it on your blog, and come back over to Mama Kat's to add your name to the link list.   Also, try to comment on the three blogs above your name!!

The Prompts:

1.) Last week we talked about introverts…this week share a lessons (or lessons) you learned about friendship from an extravert.
2.) List the names of five dogs from your lifetime. Write about why one sparks a stronger memory to you than the others.
3.) You stepped foot into your first apartment and thought…
4.)Describe the scene at breakfast.
5.) What brings you joy in good time (and bad)? 

I chose number five this week.  What brings me joy in the good times and the bad?

Psalms 30:5 For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

For me, joy is simply found by choosing to follow my Savior.  It doesn't always surround me.  Sometimes it is hard to remember it.  But I know if I will only endure, Joy really will come in the morning. 
It is the peace that I find in the scriptures, the sweetness in my Savior's love.  It is the busyness of church, and the chaos of home.  Joy is found in hundreds of little things that are in my life.  Sometimes, I just  have to have the faith to get through the trial to the joy that waits on the other side. 
Second by second, minute by minute, day by day, we go from where ever we were to where we are right this moment.  If we are not careful, the days will pass almost without us being aware of it.  Joy waits patiently for us to learn to savor all she has to offer. 
I experience joy when I am grateful for the gifts that are all around me.  I see joy in the sunrise as well as the sunset.  I hear joy in the birdsong as well as the silence of the wind in the branches.  I feel joy in the sweet, sticky hugs of grandchildren, as well as the tender words of love spoken by those closest to my heart.  I touch joy in the soft skin of a newborn as well as in the (often) bearded face of my husband. 
Joy is all around us.  I have learned I need to look and be grateful for what I have, instead of dwelling on the sorrow for what I might be missing. 
Joy starts at any moment when I feel gratitude for my blessings.  And it fills my heart when I feel His love and peace.  

Psalms 16:11  Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore. 

Take Time To Play

Galatians 5:22   "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith," 

I am a serious person. Sometimes I wonder how I ever got this way. I honestly don't remember a time in my life when I ever acted "silly". I have always been responsible. Quick to do the right thing and slow to do anything in the name of "fun". I am so overwhelmed with the responsibilities of life, that I sometimes forget that my Heavenly Father also wants me to experience joy. I have started to realize that I need to change.

Don't get me wrong.  I believe that there are times when seriousness is necessary and important.  I know that there are times when it would be inappropriate to laugh and play.  But, I have spent so much of my life doing the serious things, the responsible take-care-of-everyone-else things, that I have forgotten what it means to take a few unplanned moments for joy.  

I forget that happiness isn't something you choreograph, or something you need to spend lots of money and time on.  It is something that you find by recognizing and enjoying the simple moments that happen on a daily basis.  The moments that you miss if you are not paying attention.  The smiles that light up, not only the faces, but the eyes, of your children.
The sharing of a cherished toy or a hard earned snack.  The kindness when you least expect it.  The willingness to do something they don't like, simply because you like it.  The laughter, the giggles, even the good-natured teasing of sisters who live together and care about each other (most of the time).   The support, the encouragement, the love in all it's many forms and faces.  Especially the love.
Life is full of so many moments.  It is easy to let them pass you by.  It is easy to forget that life is not about going from one big thing to the next.  Instead, it is about all the small, in between, happy go lucky, amazing little things that make up each day and give us the strength to go from moment to moment.  The strength to persevere, the strength to continue on, the strength to be who we need to and want to be.

"If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love.....
"These things I have spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full."
John 15:10-11.

Happiness

by Patricia A. Pitterle

Happiness

Doesn't just happen.

You have to watch

For it, in the moments

Of life that come

Whizzing by.

Those minutes

That don't slow down

And wait for you to notice.

If you are not paying attention,

Those simple opportunities 

Will pass you by.

I have learned that

You have to be willing

To see joy wherever it might hide.

Money or possessions

are not as important

As your willingness to look.

You can find it in moments 

Of seeming darkness

Surrounded by difficulties and trials.

You can also find it  

In the brilliant sunshine 

Of peace and contentment.

You find happiness

In the hundreds 

Of little moments in your life.

Those small, simple things 

That remind you 

Of what is most important.

The whispers of God

That speak to us from

The smile of a stranger,

The touch of a friend,

The comfort of family,

And most of all, love.

The love that shines forth

In the eyes of a child.

The squishy, bedtime hugs

And sticky, anytime kisses.

The moments of life that give us

A glimpse into eternity.

Joy is there

Waiting to 

Jump into view

As soon as you are willing

To reach out from your waiting

And embrace it.

Pollyanna

A couple of nights ago, we had a family movie night.  The girls chose to watch the movie "Pollyanna".  I still have the old VHS movie, we don't own the DVD.  We have hung on to it all these years because it is one of my all time favorites.  I love that little girl! I love her cheerful spirit, her willingness to help, and most of all, I love her attitude!  There is just something contagious about Pollyanna.  
I have been referred to as being a little "Pollyannaish" myself.  I think they might have meant that I could be unrealistic, and overly optimistic, or as someone I knew used to say, "you are so naive!  (What can I say, these were postal employees who called me that!)
This film is about a little girl whose parents were killed and she was sent to the states to live with an aunt.  Her aunt controls or owns nearly everything in the town.  When Pollyanna first comes to her new home, her aunt treats her as if she is someone to be tolerated and not loved.  
I love the scene when Pollyanna finds the reverend in the field practicing his "sermon" and tells him how her father taught her that there were over 800 happy texts in the Bible and if the Lord took the trouble to tell us over 800 times to be happy, then He must have meant it.  I also love the quote that Pollyanna wears on a necklace around her neck.  It was supposedly her father's and it says, "When you look for the bad in mankind, expecting to find it, you surely will."  No matter who said it, it remains true today.  
I have always loved this film.  To me, there are so many good principles in it.  I think if you look for the good, you can find that too.  It is all a matter of what your focus is.  I love the "glad" attitude that Pollyanna is famous for.  She teaches everyone in town her game.  That wonderful "glad game" when bad things happen, there is still something to be glad about.  I love the fact that on Sunday, you can be glad that it will be six whole days until Sunday comes around again!  (Not that I feel that way, I just like the possibility).  I like to think that Heavenly Father would want us to focus on being a happy people.  I think He wants us to know joy.  I think He would want us to be glad.


 "This is the day that the Lord hath made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." (Psalm 118:24.)

It seems to me, as if the Lord would want us to find something to be glad about in the blessings He sends to us.  We all have trials and tribulations, but we also have moments of absolute joy and happiness.  I wonder which we remember more?  I wonder where our focus is?  Are we happy with what we have, or do we find fault with what He provides?  Is there gratitude and gladness in our souls today?
I think we all have a little Pollyanna inside ourselves waiting and even hoping, to come out.  We all have a little bit of gladness wanting to shine.  It is up to us not to fear the ridicule of those in the large and spacious building.  Sometimes, we just need to project a little gladness into the lives of those around us in order to bring forth the blessings.  

The following story is one I heard often in my Management courses in school:
"During my second year of nursing school our professor gave us a quiz.  I breezed through the questions until I read the last one:  "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"  Surely this was a joke.  I had seen the cleaning woman several times, but how would I know her name?  I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.  Before the class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our grade.  "Absolutely," the professor said.  "In your careers, you will meet many people.  All are significant.  They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello."  I've never forgotten that lesson.  I also learned her name was Dorothy".  ~Joann C. Jones

Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you, not because they are nice, but because you are!  May you each remember that Pollyanna can and does live inside you.  

Let her out and be GLAD today!

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms--to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.  Viktor E. Frankl

I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day

I love this song.  Actually, it is probably my favorite song of the entire season. There is something so sad about it, and then the last verse comes out so powerful and hope fills my heart.  What makes this song so special though, is the story behind it.  I heard it recited on Music and the Spoken Word, on the BYU channel.  I have always loved the story, but it means so much more to me now.  We each face trials.  It is part of why we came here.  But, believe it or not, it is not the trials that break us.  It is what we do or do not do because of them.  "I heard the Bells on Christmas Day" was written by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

This story, about the hymn “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day,” was taken from this website (which gives permission to share and copy the article).
http://www.whatsaiththescripture.com/Fellowship/Edit_I.Heard.the.Bells.html

One of America’s best known poets, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882), contributed to the wealth of carols sung each Christmas season, when he composed the words to “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day” on December 25th 1864. The carol was originally a poem, “Christmas Bells,” containing seven stanzas…

The poem gave birth to the carol, “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day,” and… five [of the seven] stanzas [two referring to the Civil War were removed] were slightly rearranged in 1872 by John Baptiste Calkin (1827-1905), who also gave us the memorable tune.
When Longfellow penned the words to his poem, America was still months away from Lee’s surrender to Grant at Appomattox Court House on April 9th 1865; and, his poem reflected the prior years of the war’s despair, while ending with a confident hope of triumphant peace. (…[At this time, Lincoln] prompted his countrymen to “rest humbly in the hope authorized by the Divine teachings, that the united cry of the Nation will be heard on high, and answered with blessings, no less than the pardon of our national sins, and the restoration of our now divided and suffering Country, to its former happy condition of unity and peace.”)

As with any composition that touches the heart of the hearer, “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day” flowed from the experience of Longfellow– involving the tragic death of his wife Fanny and the crippling injury of his son Charles from war wounds…. Henry married Frances Appleton [Fanny] on July 13th 1843, and they settled down in the historic Craigie House overlooking the Charles River in Cambridge, Massachusetts. They were blessed with…five children– Charles, Ernest, Alice, Edith, and Allegra….

Tragedy struck both the nation and the Longfellow family in 1861. Confederate Gen. Pierre G. T. Beauregard fired the opening salvos of the American Civil War on April 12th, and Fanny Longfellow was fatally burned in an accident in the library of Craigie House on July 10th…. After trimming some of seven year old Edith’s beautiful curls, Fanny decided to preserve the clippings in sealing wax. Melting a bar of sealing wax with a candle, a few drops fell unnoticed upon her dress. The longed for sea breeze gusted through the window, igniting the light material of Fanny’s dress– immediately wrapping her in flames. In her attempt to protect Edith and Allegra, she ran to Henry’s study in the next room, where Henry frantically attempted to extinguish the flames with a nearby, but undersized throw rug…. Failing to stop the fire with the rug, he tried to smother the flames by throwing his arms around Frances– severely burning his face, arms, and hands. Fanny Longfellow died the next morning. Too ill from his burns and grief, Henry did not attend her funeral. (Incidentally, the trademark full beard of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow arose from his inability to shave after this tragedy.)

The first Christmas after Fanny’s death, Longfellow wrote, “How inexpressibly sad are all holidays.” A year after the incident, he wrote, “I can make no record of these days. Better leave them wrapped in silence. Perhaps someday God will give me peace.” Longfellow’s journal entry for December 25th 1862 reads: “‘A merry Christmas’ say the children, but that is no more for me.”
Almost a year later, Longfellow received word that his oldest son Charles, a lieutenant in the Army of the Potomac, had been severely wounded with a bullet passing under his shoulder blades and taking off one of the spinal processes. The Christmas of 1863 was silent in Longfellow’s journal…. Finally, on Christmas Day of 1864, he wrote the words of the poem, “Christmas Bells.” The reelection of Abraham Lincoln or the possible end of the terrible war may have been the occasion for the poem. Lt. Charles Longfellow did not die that Christmas, but lived. So, contrary to popular belief, the occasion of writing that much loved Christmas carol was not due to Charles’ death.
Longfellow’s Christmas bells loudly proclaimed, “God is not dead, nor doth he sleep”

Here are the words to that Christmas Carol that were written so long ago. 



I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
(Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882), 1867)

I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

I thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head:
"There is no peace on earth," I said,
"For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men."

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
"God is not dead, nor doth he sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail,
With peace on earth, good will to men."

Till, ringing singing, on its way,
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime,
Of peace on earth, good will to men!

May you find your peace in the Savior this Christmas season and always.  And my you continue to have everlasting hope and joy in His love. 
"It is not enough to know that God lives, that Jesus Christ is our
Savior, and that the gospel is true. We must take the high road by acting
upon that knowledge." Elder Dallon H. Oaks

"The Lord works from the inside out. The world works from the outside in. The world would take people out of the slums. Christ takes the slums out of people, and then they take themselves out of the slums. The world would mold men by changing their environment. Christ changes men, who then change their environment. The world would shape human behavior, but Christ can change human nature."
--Ezra Taft Benson, "Born of God", Ensign, July 1989, 2

Happy is the Man (or Woman)

"A proverb in the Old Testament states: 'He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city' (Proverbs 16:32).
"It is when we become angry that we get into trouble. The road rage that affects our highways is a hateful expression of anger. I dare say that most of the inmates of our prisons are there because they did something when they were angry. In their wrath they swore, they lost control of themselves, and terrible things followed, even murder. There were moments of offense followed by years of regret. . . .
"So many of us make a great fuss of matters of small consequence. We are so easily offended. Happy is the man who can brush aside the offending remarks of another and go on his way."  Gordon B Hinckley

One of the lessons we talked about yesterday was in setting an example and remembering to have gratitude in our lives.  As I researched the topic today, I came across the previous quote.  I do believe that it is when we become angry that we get into trouble.  I know that many of the mistakes in my own life were made because I was angry at someone or something, or even at myself.
This next month is when the world celebrates the birthday of Jesus Christ.  I was reading online somewhere today of a family tradition.  This family hangs a gold stocking for Jesus and during the month of December, every family member writes down their gift to him.  It can be as simple as reading a book of scripture, or saying daily prayers.  It can even be more complex, such as serving every month at the local food bank.  I loved that tradition.  What a wonderful way to remind my children what the Christmas season is really about and to whom they should give their gifts.
My gift to the Savior this month is to be a little more kind to those around me.  Especially, at the Post Office.  It is so easy to get frustrated with others and to react instead of act.  Saturday was a great example.  I had a lady ring the bell and start yelling that we had her package.  She had mistakenly had it sent to the street address instead of the PO Box.  I have not seen her package, and it would have been so easy to yell back!  Instead, I asked her to lower her voice or else come back on Monday.  Than, I started to help her.  She calmed right down.  I did not accuse her or blame her for anything.  I simply made a note for the back table with her correct address, gave her my name and phone number and told her that I would not send it back if I received it.  It was such and easy fix and all my employees were amazed because she responded well to me.  (She is usually quite contrary).
It was actually easy for me to do because I wasn't reacting to her.  What a great way to start the morning.  After that experience, we had the lesson in church on Sunday.  Do you think that Heavenly Father is trying to give me a message???
So, today, I am trying to put into place calmness and gratitude in my own life.  Kayla was doing dishes and pouting and slamming the dishes.  She broke one of the plates.  I did not get made, just told her to throw it away and clean up the mess.  Then, I asked her to come see me.  She said "no!" with a pout.  Now , if you know my daughter Kayla, you know how great she can pout!  So, I started counting, 1, 2, 10!  Then I ran after her.  She ran laughing and giggling to the garage door where she couldn't get away from me and I tickled her.  She collapsed laughing and than went back and finished the dishes with no complaints.  Calmness AND gratitude.  I remembered to tell her how much I appreciated her and how much she contributes to the family when she is helpful.  We finished the evening, both happy.

Marcus B. Nash said, "In order to have joy, you need to understand that, as a child of your Heavenly Father, you inherited divine traits and spiritual needs--and just like a fish needs water, you need the gospel and the companionship of the Holy Ghost to be truly, deeply happy. Because you are the offspring of God (see Acts 17:28), it is incompatible with your eternal nature to do wrong and feel right. It cannot be done. It is part of your spiritual DNA, as it were, that peace, joy, and happiness will be yours only to the degree you live the gospel."

The second commandment, we are told, is like unto the first, "love your neighbor as yourself".  When I succeed in loving my neighbors, than I will realize that they also are divine and have inherited some of the same traits from our Heavenly Father.  Who are my neighbors?  I believe that they are all around us.  They are in our homes, our streets, our places of work, and anywhere we may visit.  I think that true joy and happiness, comes from doing the will of our Heavenly Father in all things.  I think that in the end it won't matter how many scriptures I know, or how many books I have read, or how righteous the world thinks I am.  Do you think that He will welcome me into His kingdom if I am angry and resentful?  How about if I justify my actions because of the behavior of someone else?
I don't think that I will make it to my Father's house if I am not kind and loving to His children.  I think that part of developing true charity is learning to love others that might seem different than we are.  It is also showing and over abundance of kindness in the face of anger and bitterness.  It truly is turning the other cheek.
My December gift to the Christ child is to work on cultivating a kind and loving heart, at all times and in all places.  May we each come to the manger with one good gift.