Harmony

Sometimes, we think that happiness is something we buy, or something we receive.  It is the new house, or the new car, or the new toy.  We start to think that happiness is more about things than about the life we are living.  We forget that happiness is something we have to find from within.
Happiness is a state of mind and being.  It is not and never has been about things.  It is not even about people or those we love.  It is not about feeling lonely or lost or useless.  It is about changing the way we are thinking and the parts of life that we are looking at.
I tend to focus on too much negative in my life.  Believe me, if you look for it, you will find it everywhere!  We are surrounded by negative things.  There are always those who seem to have it better than we do.  There are always others to compare ourselves to.  There is always something we want and can't get.  There are always things going wrong and it can seem as if not enough is going right in our lives. 
I suffer from depression and anxiety.  Those are two diseases that make it so that I can't even begin to explain how many negatives I experience any given day.  I constantly focus on that negative and on my internal thoughts and feelings and feel a complete lack of happiness in my life.  There are moments, but it is not a constant state for me. 
I am trying to change myself to get better at find the harmony within.  The things I do and say are usually good.  But it is the thoughts that continually bring my focus to the problem places instead of the joy.  It is my thoughts that I need to change.
So, what am I doing?  I am trying to remind myself that a bad moment is simply a moment.  It is not my entire life.  I am trying to surround myself with reminders of joy.  Pictures of grandchildren, papers they have drawn for me, cards and notes and pictures of events. 
When the negative intrudes (as it will) I am trying to shift my focus to one of those joyful things.  I have thoughts and quotes on my bathroom mirror and around my house.  I am reading uplifting material.  I am starting to write again and draw and allow myself to post and do something that seems imperfect to me.  I am trying to focus on the good inside myself instead of the person that I think I SHOULD be.  I am letting go instead of holding on. 
Happiness is available to each one of us.  I am learning that it is more focused on the way I look outward and inward than it is a real state of being in Harmony with yourself. 

Live in the moment

Live in the moment.  Something I am trying desperately to learn.  I live and breath in the world of worry.  In the world of what if's and should have's.  I am not so good at being right here in this place and time.  There always seems to be more I should have done and should be doing.  Better choices I could have made.  More good I could have done.  In short, I never seem to be quite enough.  The monster of "comparison" has me tightly by the throat and I am really trying to shake him loose!
For Christmas this year, my sister bought me a subscription to Hilary Weeks "Live All In Today" year long program.  I am loving it.  Not only am I a huge fan of her music, but I love the chat group and the assignments every day to help me live in this here and now moment of my life.    I love the way I am starting (just barely) to focus a little more on what is happening around me.  I love how there are small changes that I am starting to notice, as I truly try and live in the moment instead of in the past or the future of my life.
I am learning to rejoice in music I love.
I am learning that there is never going to be another moment quite like the one I am in right this minute. 
I am learning to make the most of it.
I am even learning that it is ok to be myself! 
The most important part, is I am learning to live, right here in this most important today of my life.

Thank you Sandi, for this amazing gift of love!

https://www.liveallintoday.com/

Always Go For What Makes You Happy

I forget this sometimes.
For me, it is so easy to spend my time, efforts, and money on helping everyone else be happy.  It is much harder for me to spend those same things on myself.  Sometimes, when I focus on other people, it helps me to be happy.  I love doing things for others and taking time for them and working to provide for their needs and wants.  I love finding the perfect quote, or the perfect gift for them on the day that they need it.
But in doing everything for someone else, it become easier and easier to lose track of me.  I feel lazy when I try and take care of myself.  I feel like I don't have any worth.  I feel selfish.  I am not entirely sure where all those feelings come from, but somehow, they can be incredibly overwhelming to me.
Today, I am trying to take care of me.  I am going to the dentist and the doctor.  I am cleaning my floor and tidying the computer area.  I am reading a book.  There are so many other things that I need to do, but just for today, I am going to do what needs doing to help me feel a little better about me.

Happiness is Something We Are

Too often, we think of happiness as a goal.  Something that we are supposed to get.  Something that someone else makes us feel.  Too often, we don't realize that happiness is always something that is within ourselves.  No one else has the right or the responsibility to make us happy.  It is something within ourselves.  It is our own opportunity to become a little better.
I have noticed, that when I was younger and did not know any better, I would expect those around me to help "make" me happy.  In the same way, I would tell my children when they "made" me angry, or "made" me sad.  I had to grow up to realize, that in reality, they never had that power over my emotions.  Only I have that kind of power. 
It is easy to focus on the should have's and could haves.  I am learning that the only way to be truly happy is to focus on the present, exactly how it is, in all it's mixed up, craziness and overwhelming glory. 
We might not be perfect, the place might not be perfect, our families might not be perfect, and neither are our friends and neighbors.  But we can each have nearly perfect moments along the way and choose to be happy.   

What it is.

I found this one and it resonated with me.  I think I am guilty of being a person who has definite ideas of how things "should" be.  I know for a fact that when I live too much with the "would have's", "could have's" and "should have's" I am most certainly not happy.  I have decided that that lack of happiness is because I focus too much on how things should be, I am not living in the present, but more in the past or even the future. 
It has been hard for me to find my own "happy" place.  I have to focus constantly on living in the here and now, not next week or next month or even next year.  Raising so many children, it seems as if all the good was just around the corner.  When they are potty trained, when they are in school, when they graduate. 
Too often, I find myself not enjoying the spot right where I am.  I find myself waiting to see what else might happen.  I find myself not living right here.  I find myself in living the "What next" phase of life.  
I am learning that things are never the way I dreamed they would be.  People make their own choices, bad things happen to good people, promises are broken, and sometimes, it is as simple as illness that changes the way you always looked at the world around you.  
I am learning that we each look at life according to our own experiences, our own heartaches, trials, misadventures, and fears.  We look at life the way that we expect it to be based on our past.
As I read the above quote, I am reminded that I survived the past.   It is not longer here to disappoint me.  It is no longer part of my life to hurt me.  I can  hurt from it forever, or learn from it now.  The choice to be happy has always been mine.       

Silence and Smiling

I am working on this.  Silence as an answer.  I get frustrated when people yell at me and behave badly.  I want to lash out with words to wipe the smirk off their face.  I know that I cannot, but I get very tired of two year old temper tantrums in the supposedly adult population of the world I live in.  I am exhausted by the bad behavior of others.  I get equally exhausted by the frustrations of my teens who are getting ready to get out of school.  It is finals, field trips, graduation, senior projects, senior trips, concerts and activity after activity after activity.  Culminating in a wild summer with cousins and the other daughters summer earning money by babysitting. 

This week, I am working really hard on responding to negativity with silence and a smile.  I just have to make sure that they do not perceive my smile as laughter.  That could get me in a whole different mess.  It could also heighten the misunderstandings that already surround me.

Today, I am smiling more and frowning less.  It does seem to make a difference.  Maybe, not so much in the way others behave, but definitely in my own level of stress, and my own feelings of peace.  It helps me to breath.  I makes those bad moments seem, no so bad after all. 

I am not sure that silence is always the best answer, but I am sure that I should use it more often.  People really want to be listened to.  They want to explain what is wrong.  So, even when I know, I am trying harder to give them the chance to put it into their own words.  The chance to express themselves.  The chance to hear their own voices in all the noise that surrounds us.

Now, if only it worked for getting my teenagers to do the dishes.......

Happiness is not a goal

 

This was a different way of looking at things for me.  When I think of being happy, I tend to think of it as something I will be in the future.  After the kids are grown, after the bills are paid, after this trial is over.  I don't usually look at it as something happening right this minute.  In ways I don't always understand, we are all chasing a dream.  We all want to be happy, and even more important, we all want to be happy right this minute.

This simple quote made me think for a moment.  What if happiness really isn't the goal?  What if it is supposed to be something that we all experience along the way.  There are times when I have been incredibly happy.  When I felt really good about what was going on in my life.  There have also been times when I have been caught up in depression and despair.  Times when happiness seems to be completely out of my reach, and when I am absolutely sure it will never come to pass. 

What makes the difference between those two extremes?  I would have to say that it is my own state of mind.  It is how I am experiencing the world around me right at this moment.  It is what I am focusing on, what I am hearing, who I am being.  The difference is within myself.  It is looking at whether the glass is half full, or half empty.  It is realizing that it is the same glass and it has water to drink just waiting for me to partake.

So, if happiness isn't the goal, what prevents me from being happy all the time?  What is stopping me from experiencing joy right now in my individual journey?   That is an answer I am pondering and studying.  It is the question that I really want to know.  With all the trials in my life, I am pretty sure that they are not over yet.  So, there is going to be more times of anxiety for me to go through.  I would really like to change the anxiety into at least a few times of happiness.  I would like happiness not to be something I am chasing, but something that is happening right now, inside myself. 

Perhaps it is a matter of realizing that happiness isn't the same thing as "fun".  Happiness isn't necessarily laughing and giggling throughout the day.  I believe that happiness is that calm, peaceful feeling you get when you know you are doing the right things for the right reasons.  Happiness for me, involves faith and trust.  It is in knowing that everything will work out just the way it is supposed to.  It is the peacefulness that I feel after a trial has passed and I have survived.  Happiness, is a state of being. 

 

 

Seven Steps to Happiness

Happiness can feel so elusive at times, especially when you are going through something that hurts your heart.  Something that you never imagined you would ever be faced with.  I know that the Lord wants us to have joy, even in the times of trial.  He wants us to find happiness within ourselves and through the service that we provide to others.  Those others can, and often do, involve our families. 
It is easy for me to focus so much on the trial, that I forget to see the things around me that are indeed joys.  I found this little quote on the internet.  (What would we do without technology!!) and I really like it.  It reminds me that I can do something about the way I feel, even if it is only small.  I can make a different choice. 
The first time one of my grandchildren spent the night, he was a little nervous about it.  His mom never let him stay overnight anywhere and Grammys house was no exception.  We had a lot of fun.  We went sledding, we bounced on the trampoline, we fed the chickens and made dinner.  But when it came time for bed, he got a little bit teary eyed.  I let him call his mom to wish her a good night, and in a very quavering voice he said, "I think maybe I should have made a different choice".  He was not quite ready to leave the comfort of home. 
He slept over and had more fun the next day and by the time he went home he was fine.  He had a wonderful weekend, and he forgot about "the choice".  He remembered the fun time that he had with his brother and the things that they had done together. 
It is easy for us to focus so much on our sorrow of the moment, that we forget to find the joy that surrounds us.   Every single attitude in our life is a choice.  If I can just remember that when I am feeling a little on the less side, I will be able to find the more. 

John 16:22 And ye now therefore have sorrow: but I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice, and your joy no man taketh from you.

It Starts With You

 

 

This one is hard for me to remember.  Sometimes, I feel like it is Someone Else's responsibility to make sure I am happy.  My head knows that is wrong, but my heart wants it to be true. 

I found a great quote yesterday that says:  "Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they never stopped to enjoy it!" 

That is very much me.  I don't stop and smell the roses as my husband would tell me.  I just kind of go along trying and failing to get everything done and make everyone else happy.  It hurts me when I can't make it happen!  I get so busy with everyone else, that I forget to take the time that I need for me.  

Fighting depression and anxiety is a constant struggle.  I want so much to BE happy, but I go about it in all the wrong ways.  I spend way too much time working and surviving and not nearly enough time sitting back and enjoying.  I focus on the getting there, instead of on the journey itself.

I think maybe, my priorities for happiness are just a little bit (OK, maybe a lot), mixed up.  I forget how things don't make us happy.  It really is about what I am feeling inside, and when I am too tired to even enjoy the fruits of my labors, how can I ever think to find happiness.  

So, here I am, taking a deep breath and moving on.  

Happiness seems so elusive when we are getting down and dirty with life.  Just when it seems that I will move forward, I sink into a hidden puddle and end up sliding back.  Life is unpredictable.  It is hard.  It is lonely, it is rough and rowdy and really, really messy.   But I also know that it is possible find those little, sparkling gems of happiness in the middle of the mud. 

I have to find them inside myself first.     It sounds so simple, but is in reality pretty hard.  I have to look past the darkness and find those bits and pieces that can bring me joy.  I have to live in the present moment, instead of the future and the past.  I have to let go and trust that everything is in His hands and that He has my back. 

I have to believe that I am lovable and worth loving.  I have to believe that I am worth some tiny spark of happiness.  I have to believe that there is good within myself. 

I have to take time and make time to be happy.      

Letting Go

 

I forget to find joy in the moment.  I have an entire laundry list of Should have's and could have's, but I really need to figure out how to burn that list and come up with all the things are really ARE. 

When I was young, I really wanted to be a doctor, but life stepped in and I became a mother instead.  I am not sorry for a single moment of not doctoring that happened.  I am sorry that that dream took me so very long to let go of.  I started going to school to be a nurse, but found myself in the position of being a single mother instead.  So, I went to work.  I have waited tables, been a nursing assistant, delivered papers, taken pictures, been an EMT and even been a telephone solicitor.  I have done anything and everything that I could to support my family and raise my children. 

But I have never let go of the should have's and could have's.  Perhaps it is time now. 

I love my EMT job.  It doesn't really pay, but it is truly a job of love.  I love being able to help people who are hurting and see direct results because I get them to the care they need.  I love my family.  I have been able to raise and love my children.  They have become adults that I can be proud of.  They are truly better than I have ever been, and that is all I could ever ask for.  I think that my life looks exactly how it is supposed to.  It might not be the way that I imagined it, but it is a life that I can celebrate.   

 

2 Nephi 2:25    Adam fell that men might be;
and men are, that they might have joy.

Heavenly Father did not send us here to be miserable.  He wants us to be happy.  He wants us to have joy.  He wants us to celebrate the good things in our lives.  He wants us to celebrate our blessings.  I love that He is mindful of our happiness.  I love that He wants us to be positive about our lives.  So today, I am going to trust that He knows exactly who I needed to be and that all these experiences shall be for my good. 
Today, I am letting go of the past and moving forward toward a new future. 
Today, I am going to find my joy. 

Wordless Wednesday - Makes me smile!

A single photo 

– no words –

capturing a moment from our lives.

A simple, special, extraordinary moment.

A moment

I want to pause, savor and remember.

A moment

that brings a smile to my lips, 

and joy to my heart.

You are Amazing - He knows

I wanted to do a series of blogs about how amazing you truly are.  It is easy to get lost in the shuffle of comparing ourselves to everyone else.  It is easy for me to feel "not good enough".  The truth is, that we are all good enough, just as we are.  He loves us right here and right now, at what may be our best moment, or our worst.  He loves us no matter what our past has been.  He just loves us and accepts us with all our faults and failings.  Every single one of us has the opportunity to start right now, and change the course of our history.  We can change the ending of our stories.  We can still become exactly who He needs us to be. 
So, each day, I am going to try to introduce a verse of scripture or a quote that reminds you that you are loved, that you are enough, and that you can do this.  We just have to stop looking over the mountain at where we think we should be and study the place in which we find ourselves right now. 

Matthew 14:27
"But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid". 

What a beautiful verse!  Imagine for a moment, what it would be like to have Christ standing next to you and telling you to "be of good cheer, it is I, be not afraid". 
I am a worrier by nature.  I worry about everything.  As a matter of fact, I actually made myself sick this week worrying about whether or not things were going to be alright.  When I read this scripture, I honestly felt as though Christ were whispering into my own ear!  He was telling me not to worry, not to be afraid.  He has got this, and me, through everything. 
How easy it can be to look at the scriptures and believe that they were written for others.  To think that they are for another time and place and don't apply to our current busy lives.  To recognize, in someone else's life, the need for the words in scripture. 
How difficult it can be to take the teachings and apply them to the here and now world that we live in.  To realize that He loves us equally as much as He loved them.  To acknowledge that we aren't alone and that our lives matter to Him.  So, today, I would like to remind you that you matter.  Be of Good Cheer.  He knows you.  He knows what you need.  He knows that you are hurting.  He knows your pain.  He knows your trials.  And in a very real way, He knows the blessings that you will be given. 
Today, put your hand in His and be not afraid. 

Joy in the Journey

This is one of my favorite quotes.  I am really working on it in my own life.  I can get so caught up in living, that I forget there is supposed to be joy in the things we do. 
Without going into a lot of detail, I have gone through some rough things in the past year.  I had someone today tell me that I seemed happier because someone else is not around to hurt me.  I think I am.  I just haven't realized how very difficult it is for me to be around people who suck the happiness right out of me. 
I am someone who always tries to do things for others.  I put myself last.  Usually only when I don't have any reserves left.  Even my councilor says that he doesn't want to see the old me again.  He is afraid that in spite of the amazing strides I have made this year, I will lose it as life reaches out and grips me by the throat once again.  I don't want that to happen. 
I am leaning that there are some things you cannot change.  There are people who are always going to take advantage of me.  There are people who just don't like me and aren't willing to give me a chance.  If I judge myself based on what all those other people think, I will go right back into the cycle of depression and anxiety that I have worked so very hard to get out of. 
I know that I focus so much on serving, I forget to serve myself.  It is really a struggle for me because I end up feeling selfish when I fight for something that I want badly.  I hate feeling selfish.  I really want to help others.  I just run out of energy when I don't do something for myself every once in a while. 
So today, I am going to try harder to find joy in my own journey.  It may be hard, but it is mine.  It may not be exactly what I planned on, but it is beautiful in it's own way.  May we all remember that the finish line is very far away, and Heavenly Father never intended for us to suffer through life without any joy.  We might have to walk between sorrows to find it, but there is always, always joy in our journey. 

Compliment People

 

Oh, this one hit me hard today.  If we could only complement each other more and find fault a little less!  I used to tell my children that they needed to stick together.  They would be in each others lives forever, they should be friends and not enemies.  They should be kindest to each other, and not save that for only friends.   It was hard when they were younger.  They fought over so many little things.  We all have our own opinions and ideas and ways of doing something.  Just because it is different, doesn't make it wrong. 

We live in a society that never wants to take the blame for anything.  We live in a world that is content to pass the blame to someone else.  "Mr. Nobody" lives forever in our communities.  It can be so frustrating when people pass the time by criticizing or talking about others.  I keep asking myself, how often am I guilty of the same thing?  Or even worse, how often do I say nothing when others are speaking badly of someone?   I think that we give quiet consent when we choose to allow it to go one in our presence.  

I love the idea of talking about others strengths.  Of focusing on what they do well, instead of what they do wrong.  This month, I am going to try and be thankful for the blessings of others, no matter what they bring to the party.  I am going to try to more vocally acknowledge strengths.  We all have things we do well.  We all have things we don't do well.  But I am thinking that the more positive I can be, the more it will help others to feel good about themselves.  The more they feel good about themselves, the more likely they are to be positive.  I think the world can always use a little more positive. 

Live With Grace

HAPPINESS CANNOT BE TRAVELED TO, OWNED, EARNED, WORN OR CONSUMED.  HAPPINESS IS THE SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE OF LIVING EVERY MINUTE WITH LOVE, GRACE AND GRATITUDE. 

Love, love, love this.  Far too often, we seem to think that happiness is something we all deserve.  We imagine it all served up on a platter like a Thanksgiving Dinner.  It is there for the taking, whether we have done anything ourselves or not.  Some people think all they need is more money, more things, or more time and they will be happy.  They completely miss the point that happiness is not external.  It is what is inside.  It is the entire experience, in spite of  heartaches, trials and disappointments.  Happiness is available to each on of God's children here upon the earth.  It is not something that is saved for the elusive future.  It comes from the small everyday moments of living.  It is not for when I have become skinny, or rich, or inherit a ton of money, or any one of the myriad of ways that we confuse ourselves with the possible meaning of happiness.   

Happiness is always found inside ourselves.  It does not happen just because someone else wants it too.  It is not and never has been anyone else's responsibility to "make" us happy.  It is not what your children do, or your husband, or your neighbors or your church.  It is a state of mind.  It is a spiritual experience.  It is a gift we give ourselves in spite of our circumstances.  I love that love, grace and gratitude all go together to help us find the happiness that is within. 

Happiness is possible.

Happiness is always possible. 

A Merry Heart

I love this one.  I need to remember it.  Breathe it in and make it a part of me.  I want to have a Merry Heart.  One that puts others before myself.  One that helps others to feel comfortable and welcome.  Someone who people want to be around, and not someone who people want to avoid.
The Prophet Joseph Smith taught that “happiness is the object and design of our existence” (Teachings, 255).
That’s why our Heavenly Father’s plan is so often called the great plan of happiness. I don't believe that we are supposed to be serious all the time, or even most of the time.  I can be a very serious person, but when I let go and laugh at myself, it feels so good!  Happiness is part of our nature, as it is part of God’s nature. As Alma taught his son Corianton:
And now, my son, all men that are in a state of nature, or I would say, in a carnal state . . . are without God in the world, and they have gone contrary to the nature of God; therefore, they are in a state contrary to the nature of happiness. (Alma 41:11).
We are born with a naturally sunny, optimistic, cheerful disposition. Think of how a baby smiles and laughs and coos.  Feeling joy and happiness doesn’t mean we’re always laughing our heads off, it doesn't mean that we take everything lightly, although, laughter is very therapeutic! President James E. Faust has said: “Don’t forget to laugh at the silly things that happen. Humor . . . is a powerful force for good when used with discretion. Its physical expression, laughter, is highly therapeutic”   He’s right! When we laugh hard, our heart rate speeds up, the circulatory and immune systems are stimulated, and more endorphins are produced.  We feel better, we feel happy.  I have spent so many years not knowing how to laugh.  I am enjoying this time of my life when I am learning to appreciate the light heartedness that can come with being Merry. 
May we each find within us our own merry heart!

Gratitude Each Day

"No matter our circumstances, 

no matter our challenges or trials, 

there is something in each day 

to embrace and cherish. 

There is something in each day 

that can bring gratitude and joy 

if only we will see and appreciate it".  Deiter F. Uchtdorf

 

This man is one of my favorite speakers.  He always seems to talk about the things that I need to know and be aware of.  It is easy for me to become "lost" in my trials and circumstances.  It is easy for me to focus on the hard things to the exclusion of all else. 

One of the things I am working very hard on right now is focusing on the joys that are abundant in my life.  I know they are there.  I know they are all around me.  I get to choose exactly what it is that I am going to embrace and cherish.  I am exhausted with embracing the bad.  I am choosing to focus on the things in my life that I have to be grateful for. 

I even started counseling again.  This was a hard decision for me as I keep telling myself that I "should" be better.  I found a new therapist who gives me homework.  (Yep, at my age, I am doing homework again!)  I am learning more about myself and my relationships that I ever thought possible.  I am even learning that I can change.  I can overcome.  I can be who I was always meant to be.  That is my joy today.  I can embrace and cherish the good.  I can find gratitude through the sorrows.

I can become like HIM.  

 

 

Memoir Monday - Thanksgiving

Memory is a way of holding onto 

the things you love, the things you are, 

the things you never want to lose. 

-- Kevin Arnold (From The Wonder Years)

My memories of Thanksgiving are pretty much the same for each year.  My mother was not someone who experimented with things.  She liked it to be the same, year after year.  So, Thanksgiving for us was getting up in the morning to help pull apart the bread for the stuffing.  It was dressing up and saying grace.  It was having turkey and stuffing and putting as much into the bird as she could make fit.  It was making cranberries and sweet potatoes.  (I never did like those as a child).  It was biscuits and gravy and wine around the table.  

I still remember my first taste of wine and how it was bitter to my taste buds.  I think I was 11 that year.  My brother and I gave our glasses to my sister because she was the only one that liked it.  I think my step-father bought it in a jug!   

We would smell the cooking all day and could hardly wait to have the first taste.  I always liked the dark meat because it was juicier to me.  I loved the mashed potatoes too.  They were real and not from a box.  

Thanksgiving was a day of family.  I don't really remember going over to anyone else's house, but I do remember people coming over to ours.  I remember the way a turkey smells when it is cooking and the way the cranberry sauce simmers.  I remember the loud whoosh the oven makes when I learned to light it with a match under the pilot.  It used to scare me and my mom used to laugh.  I remember that she always seemed happy for thanksgiving.  

Thanksgiving for me is not full of bad memories.  It is full of smells and noises and laughter and good tastes.  Still today, I make gravy like my mother did and I make stuffing and my own cranberries.  I have even learned to make sweet potatoes in a way that we like.  When ever I see them, I remember mom eating them and loving them.  

I love memories of the holidays.  Even though there were some not so good times in there, the memories and clean and happy.  It is a season of the year that I really enjoy.  It is a time we labor for those whom we love the most.  Hopefully providing them with memories that they will have when they are older.  

Those things I never want to forget.  

Gratitude - Day 1

November is Thanksgiving and it is one of my favorite holidays of the year.  There is something about food that makes amazing memories.  This year, I want to focus on having gratitude for the tender mercies of my Heavenly Father.  I have so many blessings and I want to share a few of my thoughts.

Gratitude

Help us to see 

What is there,

Instead of

What isn't

My girls are amazing.  I am so thankful for them.  We have never spent a lot of money on costumes.  We usually make everything or outfit everyone with thrift store finds to become who they want to be.  All of my children have loved Halloween.  This year the girls made their own costumes and I did not even help.  They made their tutus and tied their shirts and painted their hats and glued on mustaches.  They had an amazing time, and that is what I think Halloween is all about.  Having fun.

I am not one of those people who goes crazy about the meaning behind the holiday.  To me, it is a family day.  It is a day to have fun and make caramel apples and just enjoy each other's company.  I am so grateful for these girls who make it easy to smile and laugh.  

I should say, that I am so thankful for each one of my children.  They all go overboard for halloween and have way too much fun!  Most of them make their own costumes.  I have one who sews elaborately inspired creations.  I love to see their individual takes on all of this.  

When the older kids were young, we never had money for store bought, and they had to use what they had around the house, or be a mailman.  That was the choice.  A couple of them had to be mailmen, and that was all it took.  After that, they managed to come up with amazing ideas!  

I am so very thankful for the memories that my children have given me.  When I see kids dressed up and having fun, it makes me laugh.  I am laughing at all the times we did the same things.  I am laughing at the robots and the hedgehogs, and the potato sacks.  I am laughing at the memories.  

Don't Waste It Whining

Life is too beautiful

to waste it whining.

Sometimes, life can throw us a few curve balls that really test us to our limits.  Perhaps it is your children, or a friend or a speeding ticket.  Maybe it is someone who gossips about you or puts you down.  Maybe it is even someone in your church or your school.  It can even be that three mile hike that turned out to be more like 6 miles and felt like 20!

My point is that we all have problems.  We all have adversities in out lives.  We all have reasons to whine.  It is not that we have reasons, it is simply what we are going to do about it.  I am not a fan of whining.  I have found that it makes me more unhappy and the journey seems so much longer than I thought it would be.  

My sweet daughter was with me on our "forever" hike that we all felt was never going to end.  She helped me over the rocks and through the rough spots.  She smiled and laughed and sang and just about when I was going to give up she said, "look mom, isn't that tree great?  It even has a seat.  I love the way it twists.  Can you take my picture?"  

So, here is her picture on a tree that twists in the middle of a miserable hike.  Don't you just love her smile?  She remember how much I love to take pictures on interesting things.  She knew how much I really do love nature.  She reminded me of all that with a smile and a seat upon a tree.

I have always said to my children, "If you are going to do it anyway, do it with class."  I love that line.  We know when we have to do hard things.  We even know that we might not like them.  But we really don't have to whine about them or complain or do our best to make sure every one else has just as bad of a time.  Sometimes, the best way to handle a situation is with a little class and a smile, or maybe just pointing out are really cool tree.

Life really is beautiful and no misfortune is so bad that whining about won't make it worse!

We should honor the Savior’s declaration to “be of good cheer.   (Indeed, it seems to me we may be more guilty of breaking that commandment than almost any other!) Speak hopefully. Speak encouragingly, including about yourself. Try not to complain and moan incessantly. As someone once said, “Even in the golden age of civilization someone undoubtedly grumbled that everything looked too yellow.”  Jeffrey R. Holland, The Tongue of Angels.