A Day For Pizza

BE YOURSELF AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

We had the Elders over for dinner Saturday night, along with our very good friends.  Everyone's favorite meal at our house is pizza.  You see, it is completely homemade, including the dough.  There are so many toppings on it that I usually have to eat mine with a fork, although the girls tend to not want theirs built with quite as much "stuff", they do have their favorite toppings.  They just prefer the simpler variety with cheese, pineapple, tomatoes and Canadian bacon.  The adults like pretty much everything, including a good dose of spinach and jalapenos. 
 John always starts with the little ones and they pick what they want on their half of a pizza.  Pizza choices are a very big deal in our family.  The girls consider that entire half their very own and they don't like to share.  They hide the leftovers in the fridge for lunch during the week.  They know if mom sees them, she just might, (in a fit of weakness you understand), eat those pizzas.  John made the missionaries their own pizza and then made several different types of pizza for the rest of the adults.  We don't mind sharing, so there were lots of variations to select from.
Miracle and her best friend each put their half of pizza on their plates to keep them "safe".  It is crazy around our house at pizza time.  I keep trying to tell them that they don't need a whole half of a pizza, but they insist that it is their very own because dad said so. 
Miracle also made "oohy, gooy" brownies for dessert, as a tribute to my taste, as I don't like them crunchy.  We talked, we laughed, we tried to steal pizza from the girls plates.  Life is so wonderful when you are sharing it with friends and family. 

Isn't it amazing how everyone is so different?  We are a lot like those toppings on our pizzas.  We are each just a little or a lot different than everybody else around us, and no matter how hard you try, no two slices are exactly the same.  Not only are we different, but each of us has within us something that others need.
Have you ever been able to say exactly the right thing to someone when they are hurting?  Have you ever been a comfort or a blessing to another?  Have you ever been in just the right place at the right time to give someone a helping hand?  I know that I have been.  It is an amazing feeling.
It can be hard to remember that we are supposed to be unique.  We are supposed to be ourselves.  We do not need to be just like everyone else.  Heavenly Father has put us in this place at this time to be a blessing to those around us.  We each have unique gifts.  Things inside us that are the essence of who we are.  Those things about us that make us different than anyone else. 
We all live such busy lives.  Yet, in our very "busy-ness", we are different.  We are each a Son or Daughter of God.  He loves us and we love Him.  But I do not believe that He expects us to be just alike. Like the toppings on a pizza, together, we can be so much more.  He made us different.  He made us unique.  He made us wonderful.   

“To be yourself in a world

that is constantly trying to make you something else

is the greatest accomplishment.”

― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Five Minute Friday - Ordinary

Here it is, Friday again, and one of my absolute favorite days of the week.  This is the time that I get to take a few moments and write because I love to right, without worrying about whether it is just right or not.  Now, set your timer, clear your head, for five minutes of free writing and join me over at Lisa Jo's for five minutes of fun.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back over at Lisa Jo's and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you and encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..

OK, are you ready? Please give us your best five minutes on:::

Ordinary…

START

I look in the mirror and see a plain face, small eyes, grey hair, glasses and wrinkles.  I still have a few freckles across the bridge of my nose and my eyes vary between the colors brown, yellow and green.  I don't wear makeup often, and I don't fix my hair with curlers and irons.  I am a wash and wear kind of woman.  I see someone who is so ordinary that there is nothing about her that stands out.  Sometimes, it surprises me when I see that woman in the mirror.  The inside me does not have wrinkles and shadows under her eyes.  She knows what she wants to be and how to become that person.  The inside me is spiritual and looks for God in everything.  Even in the sadness, He is here with me.  The inside me knows I am not alone even when the outside of me is crying.  The inside me is serious about most things, concerned over many things, worried about nearly everything, caring of others, and giving when I see a need.  The inside me loves fiercely and desires to protect those around me.  The outside of me is ordinary, so much so that I blend in with any crowd and always look like someone that others know.  But the inside me is unique.  She looks through her Father's eyes and sees His wonder, She hears His words, and feels His grace.  And she knows in her heart that He has made her in His image.  And perhaps, that is not so ordinary  after all.     

STOP

So, now it is your turn.  What can you write about ordinary in just five minutes.  Don't forget to go over and link up with your own Five Minute Friday.

Happily Ever After

It is only possible to live happily ever after

On a day to day basis.

Margaret Bonnano

Sometimes, I dream of a happily-ever-after.  Mine does not have trials and difficulties.  I am loved, I feel safe, I am cherished.  Everyone around me is a friend.  They care about me.  They want me to be happy. 
I think one of the hardest things we do is live in this difficult and yet amazing world.  There are those who are kind, those who are heartless, those who care and those who could care less.  There are sad people, gloomy people, angry people, cheerful people and even people who don't care about anyone else but themselves.
Sometimes you just have to accept that not everything is going to go your way.  Life is real and sometimes it is difficult, sometimes it is hard, sometimes it is downright ugly.  Sometimes it feels as if happily-ever-afters may never happen for you.  But they do and they will.  You just have to be willing to wait for the end of the story instead of wanting it all to happen in the middle.  It takes is a little bit of faith, a little bit of trust, and a little bit of willingness to change.
No matter where we look, the world is just a little bit different.  Every single place, and every single one of us make it that way.  I am learning to make my one small corner just a bit better every day.  I might not be able to fix everything today, or make every one like me, or silence the rumors, or change the past, but I can change the way that I respond to people.  I can make my happily-ever-after, moment by moment and step by step. 
It won't happen over night, it probably won't even happen in the next year or so, but just like I am working toward becoming the person that I want to be, I am working toward the happiness that I would like to have.  I am learning to trust in the Lord's timing in my life. 
And that is going to make all the difference. 

“Happily-ever-afters don't come in happily-every-days.

They are found at the end of challenges-ever-met,

promises-ever-kept, and tears-ever-wept.”

- Richelle E. Goodrich -

A Masterpiece

"The greatest masterpieces 

were once only pigments on a palette."

-Henry Hoskins-

This past weekend, we were privileged to go to the valley and attend the Arizona Allstate Performance.  This was for the Junior High School students who had competed and made Allstate.  Mikayla made it to 6th chair for the cello.  What a wonderful opportunity for her!  She was able to play with an Orchestra that was amazing. 
These kids, young as they were, were the best that I have ever heard.  It was a beautiful evening, and I was so grateful that we were able to go and listen to them perform.  It has taken so much time and effort on her part to be able to participate in this.  The kids had to compete and go to the City of Payson to play.  They received their music a month ago and had to practice it daily so that they would sound well.  They had to be willing to work hard to do what needed to be done. 
Then, after all the preliminary work was finished, they went down to the valley and spent an entire day practicing and following a conductor that they had never worked with before.  It was all a challenge to them. 
I can't tell you how many times I have listened to Kayla play these songs, or how many times she has chosen to go up to her room to work on them instead of reading a book or watching TV.  I can't even begin to explain how frustrated she was with the music, or how she thought she was never going to get it, or how she was afraid they would kick her out because she was terrible. 
But she kept practicing.  She kept trying.  She kept going forward in her studies.  When she went down to the valley, she placed sixth out of all the cellos.  That is quite an honor for a young woman who had never been to Allstate before and who was so afraid of doing badly. 
None of us ever know how things are going to turn out in our lives.  We all make mistakes, occasionally play wrong notes and sometimes feel like complete and total failures.  We are sure that we can't continue or that we have lost all hope. 
If we just keep going forward, one step at a time, one note at a time, one moment at a time, soon will will find our own symphony.  Our own concert.  Our own peace. 

"Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you;

they're supposed to help you discover who you are."

-Bernice Johnson Reagon

Sinkhole

I never knew that Arizona had sink holes.  Actually, I never even knew what one was until I looked it up.  I did not understand what caused them or what was why they happened.  Now, it is on the news.  We have our very own sink hole.  The Sinkhole is on the 89A.  That is a small highway that goes up past the Grand Canyon.  It heads off through the Navajo reservation and up into Page by Lake Powell.  It is a very secluded area.  The sink hole happened just past the turnoff toward Lee's Ferry on the Colorado River.  This pretty much isolates the city of Page.  The closest way to get to it takes three hours longer than before.  It is not an easy journey right now, and they don't know when the road will be opened again.  
So what exactly is a sinkhole, and what caused it to appear suddenly in this quiet Arizona desert?

“A sinkhole is basically a closed depression that forms in the ground,” said David Weary, a research geologist with the U.S. Geological Survey. “The simple explanation is that the ground surface falls into a void.”

But what causes that void? Weary says there a both natural and man-made triggers.

“Usually you get a collapse because something occurred that transported the material, creating the void that the sinkhole falls into,” Weary said. “If there’s a cave underground filled with soil and sediment and you get an episode of high rainfall or a change in groundwater flow, the dirt that filled the void will be hollowed. Once it hollows out close to the ground surface, it becomes thin enough that it can’t support what is on top of it and it falls in"

Life has a lot of sinkholes in it, and they are both natural and also man made.  Sometimes, things just happen, life happens.  You fall and break an arm, you get in a wreck, you lose your job.  Some things we really can't control.  We just have to push on and hope that Some Else has it all under control.  

Other sinkholes are man-made.  We make bad choices, someone else makes bad choices, we give up, turn our backs and just quit trying.  Sinkholes keep us from moving forward if we let them.  They make the road appear more difficult.  They cause delays and frustrations.  They cause us to go back in order to move forward.  

Yet, there is someone who can heal all our wounds, who can repair all the sink holes, who can forgive our wrongs and make us whole again.  There is Some One who can change our hearts and bring us Home once again.  

Sometimes, it helps to look around us and see the reminders in the little things.  Even in the sinkholes of our lives.  

The struggle of life is one of our greatest blessings.

It makes us patient, sensitive, and Godlike. 

It teaches us that although the world is full of suffering, 

it is also full of the overcoming of it.

Helen Keller 

Sabbath Day Scribblings - Press On

"When you take the path that climbs, that harder path of the Savior, there are rewards along the way. When you do something right, when you resist temptation, when you meet a goal, you will feel very good about it. It is a very different kind of feeling than you have when you violate commandments--an altogether different feeling. It brings a measure of peace and comfort and provides encouragement to press on."

—Richard G. Scott, "Finding the Way Back", Liahona and Ensign, May 1990

Five Minute Friday - What Your Mama Did

Five Minute Friday: What mama did

Today is Five Minute Friday already.  This is where we write just to write and we don't worry about whether it is just right or not.  So, spend five minutes on the topic and than go over to Lisa Jo's and share your link.  You just might find an amazing memory all tucked inside.  In just five minutes. Tell me all about what your mama did that made her yours….

{and don’t forget to spend some time commenting on the post of the person who linked up just before you}

GO:

I wish that I could say that I have millions of memories of my childhood.  But I have shoved them so far into myself that they are nearly impossible to dig up and review.  I have tried because I know that there were many good things about growing up with my family.  I want to share the good with my children so that they could come to understand and appreciate who I am, and who their grandparents are. 
I want them to know a world that was so different than the one they live in today.  A world with Wallace and Ladmo, cartoons on Saturday morning and Dark Shadows each and every day after school.  I want them to know what it was like to play Cowboys and Indians and drink from the mud puddles in the back yard.  We did not have video games or cable TV.  As a matter of fact, the channels turned off at midnight, played the National Anthem and didn't turn back on until six in the morning.   
We grew up in the hot Arizona desert.  The summers could be sweltering, and often were so hot, that if we walked on the pavement in bare feet, we would get blisters.  There was no air conditioning back in our humble apartment.  We only had a swamp cooler that blew air from the ceiling vents throughout the house.  We used to struggle to find the best place in the room where the cool air would blow right on our faces. 
One of my favorite memories of my mom is when she would take out the ironing board every week.  She always ironed her clothes in the summertime with her yellow two piece bathing suit on and her ironing board set up in the sunshine in the middle of the kitchen.  She would sing at the top of her lungs to a tune only she knew.  She used to put her own words to the songs too.  I had to laugh because she never remembered the right words to go with her songs. 
My mom passed away shortly after my last baby was born, but if I close my eyes, I can still go back to that small apartment on a hot summer day and see her there.  Her reddish brown hair curling madly on her head, her tiny body in that bright yellow swim suit, her voice raised in off key tunes and singing the words (according to her memory) right along with Jimmy Dean and Elvis. 
To this day, I can never see a yellow swim suit without remembering that part of my childhood.  The bubbles in the pool outside, climbing the clothesline pole to the roof, having a praying mantis for a pet, running in the gravel across the yard to put callouses on my feet so that they would toughen up and not get burned, and singing with my mom as she made up her own tunes. 

STOP
 

Walking in the Storm

The snow is blowing hard around my home.  The wind rushes through the trees and the ground is covered in white.  The air is cold and crisp.  My jacket does not seem warm enough.  When I walk out the door, snowflakes nest on my face and in my hair.  I look like I am wearing a white, glistening hat. 
The snow is beautiful in it's own way.  I can't seem to get enough of it, (as long as I am inside looking out!).  This is wonderful fireplace weather.  We have a fireplace that heats our home throughout the days and the nights of winter.  This is a day where you put several logs on the fire and sit around drinking hot chocolate and looking at the flames. 
There are many things about the winter that I love.  Currently, it is the way the snow is blowing sideways and you can't see more than a few feet in front of you.  All the world is a mystery.  You don't know what might be waiting just around the corner.  I love the white flakes that fall from the sky and fill the world with wonder and delight.  I love the fire and the snowmen and the sledding.  I love to watch the magic that happens when children make igloos and hills and angels.  Winter can be beautiful.  It reminds me to look for the wonder in everything. 
Winter can also be harsh.  The ice is slippery, the air is cold.  Snow freezes your cheeks and hands.  It can be difficult to get where you need to go.  Sometimes, school is canceled, the roads are closed and pipes break inside or outside the houses.  Trees can topple over from the ice and wind.  Homes and cars can be damaged and broken in the storms. 
There is difficulty in winter, but there is also joy. 
Life is much like this beautiful winter that I see outside my window.  It is filled with trials and adventures.  It brings saddness and heartache, as well as joy and blessings.  Sometimes the snows of adversity is so thick that you can't even see the road in front of you.  Sometimes you slip and hurt yourself.  Sometimes you are lost and can't find your way.  But then the sun comes out, the snow glistens, the air warms and you discover beauty that you didn't even know you had in you. 
The winter will pass away, the spring will come, the time of trials will be past.  Inside each day is a blessing.  It is up to us to look through the adversity and find the joy.  We are told, "Man is that he might have joy".  I think that Heavenly Father wants us to be happy.  He wants us to know we are loved.  He wants us to find the blessings.  He wants us to know that it is well with our souls.

It Is Well With My Soul

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain:
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
If Jordan above me shall roll,
No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life
Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

But, Lord, ’tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord!
Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul!

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

Sabbath Day Scribblings - Kindness

"There is power in our love for God and for His children, and when that love is tangibly manifest in millions of acts of Christian kindness, it will sweeten and nourish the world with the life-sustaining nectar of faith, hope, and charity."

—M. Russell Ballard, "Be Anxiously Engaged", Liahona and Ensign, November 2012

Five Minute Friday - Beloved

On Fridays around these parts I like to join up with Lisa Jo over at The Gypsy Mama to write.  Not for comments or traffic or anyone else’s agenda. But for pure love of the written word. For joy at the sound of syllables, sentences and paragraphs all strung together by the voice of the speaker.

We love to just write without worrying if it’s just right or not. For five minutes flat.

Here’s how we do it:

1. Write for 5 minutes flat with no editing, tweaking or self critiquing.

2. Link back over at Lisa Jo's and invite others to join in 

3. Go and tell the person who linked up before you what their words meant to you. Every writer longs to feel heard.

OK, are you ready? Give me your best five minutes for the prompt:

Beloved…

START

In my memories, I still smell that sweet, soft, wonderful baby smell.  I still see the chubby little cheeks and the squishy necks.  I remember the warm breath nuzzling next to my skin.  Each baby imprinted in my heart, my mind and my memory.  I can close my eyes and think back to the downy softness of their hair, the luminescence of their skin.   I can hear their soft little mewing as they slowly and sleepily woke up.  

Yes, there were sleepless nights and difficult days.  They grew one minute, one day, one week, one month, one year at a time.  They went from infants, to toddlers, to children, to teens to adults.  Always, always loved.  Always beloved and needed and wanted and cared for.  If I have learned nothing else in all these years, I have learned to embrace the change that I see in them.  So many years have passed, yet I hold each child close in my heart and in my memory.  They are always in my prayers and always in my thoughts.  They are all older now, yet still a very real part of me.  They make their own choices and face their fears and sorrows as well as their joys and triumphs.  The circle of life moves on, in all it's promises and trials.  Through happiness and adversity.  It continues through time.  I see my once sweet babies grow to have children of their own, I watch those beautiful babies grow and look like their parents once did.  I see life continue on in their eyes and a love that never ends shines from their hearts and back into mine.  Beloved, each and everyone in my circle dearly, dearly, beloved.  

STOP

A Leap of Faith

I found this one on Pinterest.  It made me laugh, mostly because it is so true.  When I was a young mom, one of the boys really wanted to jump off the high dive at the local pool.  He was four years old and thought he was invincible.  The lifeguard explained to him that once he went up the ladder, he could not come back down.  There was only one way off, and that was over the edge of the diving board.  

I slipped into the water and swam out to the middle to wait for him to jump.  He proudly and bravely climbed the ladder and walked to the edge of the board.  Then he looked at the distance down to the water and promptly sunk to his belly and grabbed the board, screaming as loud as he could.  

The lifeguard went up the ladder and tried to coax him off the board and into the water.  My son wouldn't have anything to do with it.  So the lifeguard picked him up and unceremoniously dropped him right over the edge of the board into the water right in front of me.  I fished him out and helped him swim to the edge.  After an hour or so of jumping off the low dive, he went back up the ladder again and went off all by himself.  

I can't think of this story without a smile.  He was such a little guy and so determined to be just like the big kids.  He knew that he was going to do it.  He was determined to succeed in spite of his fears.  And finally, with a leap of faith, he went right off the board and into the water far below.  

Life can be like the diving board that my son faced that day.  Sometimes, we feel like we are surely ready to plunge to our death.  The waters of life, all the happiness and goodness seem far, far beyond our reach. We look toward it longingly, but can't seem to find the courage to do what we need to bring it within our grasp.  We hold tight to life as we have known it and don't want to let go.  Sometimes life has to get hard before we are willing to try something different.  We have to be willing to trust in Him to catch us in our fall.  He truly knows what we need and who we are.  He is always, always willing to catch us when we fall.  We just have to have to courage to trust in Him.  

Faith in Advance

Sometimes, I get so stuck in the moment, that I forget God has it all in the hollow of His Hand.  He knows the end, when I am only focused on the middle.  I am working on recognizing His hand in my life, no matter how the middle currently feels in the pit of my stomach.  
When I take a moment to look around me, I realize that I have much to be grateful for.  I do have many blessings.  I just have to look a little past the moment to find them.  I can say in all honesty, that everything I have been through up to now in my life, I would not change.  
Though there are bad things, there are also good ones.  My life has taught me strength and courage.  I know that I am not alone.  I have felt God's gifts in my life and know that He is ever mindful of me.  
I suppose, that one of the hardest things for me to learn is to simply trust Him.  It is easy to see his Hand when I look backwards.  It is much harder to see it in the moment.  So for today, I am trying to look past the hard things and have more trust in His grace.  I know He lives, I know He loves me, I know He hears and answers prayers and I know that He will help me to make sense of all this in reverse.  

Gossip- Don't Pass It Around

Gossip doesn't need to be false to be evil.  

There is a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around. 

One of the things I have learned lately, is that even when you think something is true, it might not (and probably isn't) the whole story.  It is just one side of the entire mess.  When we pass things on, even if we believe they are true, we are just passing along one side of the story.  We are judging without all the facts.  We are behaving in a way that isn't very Christlike.  I have a wonderful friend who sent me the following scripture:

Proverbs 6:16-19
These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren. 

It really made me think.  If we are gossiping, even if it is the truth as we see it, we are still sowing discord among others as well as ourselves.  Gossip doesn't have to be false to be evil.  It just has to hurt someone else or make them unhappy.  

Kind words, on the other hand, not only lift our spirits in the moment when they are given, but can linger on throughout the years.  I will never forget the day that I met President Kimball at Ricks College in Idaho.  I was there because the Teton Dam had broken and destroyed many farms and homes in the area.  I had the opportunity to help clean out basements and homes and see kindness and courage in action. 

 

President Kimball came to speak to the community.  I was standing by a door all alone when a helicopter landed outside on the field.  President Kimball came through the door with many other men.  They all walked by me without saying a word, but He noticed me.  He excused himself from the men and came over to me.  He shook my hand and looked into my eyes and reminded me that the Lord loved me, was mindful of me, and was happy with me.  It was a moment of kindness in my life that I have never forgotten.   

I want to be remembered for the kind things that I say to others, not for the negative, mean things that I might be tempted to say.  My prayer today is for each of us to be a little more willing to spread kindness instead of hate.  That we may be filled with compassion instead of judgement, and that we may turn our hearts toward Him in all we do and say.

  

Kindness is how a Christlike person treats others.  Kindness should encompass all of our words and actions, at work, at school, at church and in our homes.  Our Heavenly Father loves each and every one of us.  He knows us inside and out.  If He loves us, than who are we to doubt what we know nothing about.  

That is that amazing part of His grace.  He knows who we can become.    

So, before you speak,

THINK.

T - Is it true
H - Is it Helpful
I - Is it inspiring
N - Is it Necessary
K - Is it Kind

And if it isn't, then please don't say it.  

He Ransomed Me

He Ransomed Me

by Patricia A. Pitterle

I have sinned,

I am not perfect,

Though I wish

That I could be.

I would go back

Now and fix it,

If that choice

Were given me.

But alas,

Now I see clearly

That I can't

Take back that sin.

I can only

Come to Jesus

And let Him

Take me in.

There are those

Who do not understand

The gift

He gives to me.

How He takes

Upon Himself my sins

And sets

My spirit free.

So, though my sins

Caused red to stain

The whiteness

Of my soul,

My Savior, cleansed me 

With His blood

And made me

Once more whole.

And I have seen

His Miracles,

And I have felt

His grace,

And I've felt

His forgiveness

As I've walked

Within His place.

The stain is gone

My soul is pure

And covered 

In His love.

He ransomed me

That I might 

Live with Him in 

Father's house above.

Sabbath Day Scribblings - Plan A

If plan "A" doesn't work, 

hold on:  

The alphabet has 25 more letters!

Isaiah 40:31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

"Don’t you quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead. Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don’t come until heaven. But for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come. It will be all right in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come."—Jeffrey R. Holland, "An High Priest of Good Things to Come", Liahona and Ensign, November 1999

The Nest In My Hair

I found this one today and it struck a cord in my heart.  It has been a hard year.  The birds of sadness seem to have flown circles around me for a long time now.  It is so hard to feel betrayed and wronged.  But perhaps, at least part of it, is my own fault for dwelling on it.  For letting the birds nest in my hair.  For looking back instead of forward.
I have an amazing family.  They have been through this with me every step of the way.  They love me, cherish me, know me and strive to comfort me.  I can't help the fact that there are others around me who don't feel that way.  But I can choose to try and love them anyway.  I can choose to comb away the nest in my own hair.

Mother Therese said:  "I have found the paradox; that if you love until you hurt, there will be no more hurt, there will only be love".  

So that is the paradox that I am working on in my own life.  How to love through the hurt.  How to forgive through the pain.  How to go on when those around me want me to quit and give up.  But my Heavenly Father does no want me to quit.  And each of His children is valuable to Him.  So, I will learn to love those who do not want it.  I will do it because He wants it.  Today, I choose to brush the nest out of my hair and move on.

Five Minute Friday - BARE

Take a deep breath. You made it. It’s Friday.

Got five minutes? Let’s write. Let’s write in shades of real and brave and unscripted.

Let’s just write and not worry if it’s just right or not.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.

2. Link back over at the Gypsy Mama and invite others to join in.

3. Go wild with encouragement for the five minuter who linked up before you.

Won’t you give me your best five minutes for the prompt:

Bare….

START

Bare trees, bare ground, bare sins, bare heart.  So much in my life feels bare.  It is winter here in my beloved mountains.  Winter in the air and in the landscape.  Winter seeps into my very soul.  It has been a hard time for me.  I have felt the overwhelming aloneness of bare.  The hurts of unkind words and deeds.  Yet, I am moving through this time and working on becoming more that I have been, more than others think I am.  I am stripped to my soul and now will come the spring and the warmth and the healing.  We all have moments when we feel bare.  When there seems to be no one for company and comfort.  When embarrassment stains our cheeks with red flags of shame.  Yet, bare is not an ending, but a new beginning.  A reaching, a yearning, a seeking and a time of looking up and out into the possibilities of spring.  Here are the words to one of my favorite hymns.

         Where Can I Turn for Peace?

1. Where can I turn for peace?
Where is my solace
When other sources cease to make me whole?
When with a wounded heart, anger, or malice,
I draw myself apart,
Searching my soul? 

2. Where, when my aching grows,
Where, when I languish,
Where, in my need to know, where can I run?
Where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish?
Who, who can understand?
He, only One. 

3. He answers privately,
Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.
Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.
Constant he is and kind,
Love without end.

When we feel bare, it is a time to turn our faces toward His grace and His keeping.  A time to seek Him and know that He will fill all the bare places.  He reaches our reaching, He grasps our hands and hearts, He covers all the bare with His love without end.

STOP

Now it is your turn.  What are you going to write today in just five minutes?

Church is not for the faint of heart!

"Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way 

that leaves practically nothing unsaid."  

~Walter Winchell~

I never thought that going to church would pose such a problem for me.  It seems as if I am currently the person to gossip about.  It has been a hard enough year without adding the difficulties that I am currently going through in church.  I seem to have had the mistaken impression that church was a supposed to be sanctuary for my soul and my heart.  That I could go there to be closer to my  Heavenly Father.  That I would have support, encouragement and love through my current trials and difficulties.  That I would not be judged.  But today, I am hurting.  I am feeling betrayed and abandoned.  The voices of "I'm not good enough" are screaming through my head and I really want to stay home and hide.  
Don't get me wrong here.  I am not going to do that.  I will be sitting in the bench in the middle of the chapel come Sunday.  I might not want to be there, but I go.  I will listen, I will learn, and I won't let anyone else's actions determine when and how I worship.  
But I will share with you, in this small corner of the world, how much it hurts to be the person who is talked about.  
The Bible tells us:  “The stroke of the whip maketh marks in the flesh: but the stroke of the tongue breaketh the bones.”  Ecclesiasticus 28:17
It sounds to me as if some of the things we say can be destructive to others.  That is a chilling thought.  The voice that utters prayers, speaks softly in public, bears testimony, can also be the same voice that talks about our neighbors, bears false witness, embarrasses others, demeans, screams and even destroys.  “Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing,  My brethren these things ought not so to be.”  James 3:10
I think our words, like our deeds, should also be filled with the virtues of faith, hope and charity.  Our words should lift each other up, and not put each other down.  Our words should provide comfort, love and sanctuary to those who would listen.  May we each strive just a little harder to think before we speak and to be more Christlike in both Word and Deed.  

It is one of my sources of happiness 

never to desire a knowledge of other people's business. 

 ~Dolley Madison~

Sometimes, it is just a bad day.

“Gossip, as usual, was one-third right and two-thirds wrong.” 

-L. M. Montgomery, Chronicles of Avonlea-

Yes, I broke my arm.  Two weeks ago, I slipped on the ice and fell on my elbow.  But today, I am finally back to work.  Imagine my surprise at the rumors going all around town.  Have you ever had anyone spread things that are totally false about you?  This has been my week.  Sometimes, you just have to put it all aside and take a moment to laugh! 
I am learning that there is very little I can control in this life.  But the one thing I can control is my own attitude.  I get to determine whether I fall apart, or whether I just move on.  I get to choose whether to let someone get to me, or whether I will let it go.  I get to decide to cry, or to simply and lovingly, laugh.
Things happen to all of us that we don't choose and can't control.  Part of living is learning how to appreciate the learning that happens in spite of (or maybe because of) our individual trials.
As hard as it is to ignore the spiteful words, that is what I need to do.  So today, I choose to be kind to others as well as myself.  I choose to laugh and pass it on.

“Isn't it kind of silly 

to think that tearing someone else down 

builds you up?” 

- Sean Covey, The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective Teens -

God Is In the Details

"Small events and choices 

determine the direction of our lives 

just as small helms 

determine the directions of great ships."  

M. Russell Ballard

Sometimes we feel that we are alone and that God has forgotten us. The snow is deep, the road is rough, the struggle seems like it will never be over.  But He is always with us, extending His merciful arms toward us.  He will help us up the hill, step by step, until the struggle is over and we arrive, finally, at the top in His arms.  God is in the details of our lives.  He is in the little things as well as the seemingly big things.  He is concerned about our hearts' desires -- especially when we are choosing to live our lives in alignment with His teachings. He is always there to help us on our journey.  Reach up, reach out, and find Him.  

Sabbath Day Scribblings

"Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted 

but getting what you have, 

which once you have got it

 you may be smart enough to see 

it is what you would have wanted 

had you known."  ~Garrison Keillor

"How do we, amidst the challenges of our lives, gain the vision necessary to do those things that will bring us closer to the Savior? Speaking of vision, the book of Proverbs teaches this truth: 'Where there is no vision, the people perish' (Proverbs 29:18). If we are to prosper rather than perish, we must gain a vision of ourselves as the Savior sees us."

—Elder O. Vincent Haleck, "Having the Vision to Do", General Conference, Apr. 2012

Wise and Wonderful Things

Wise And Wonderful

by Patricia A. Pitterle

Majesty and magnitude,

Unimaginable power 

And love,

Master of creation, 

Father of all.

With infinite skill 

He created life.

His hands filled seas

and moved mountains.

His hands 

Had the strength 

To design the mighty elephant,

And the gentleness 

To softly craft

The smallest butterfly wing.

All His creations 

Bear witness

Of His work and glory.

All things testify

Of His goodness, grace

And unconditional love.

Our bodies are created

In His image.

And to act in His name.

We are each

children of our 

Heavenly King.

We have hands 

To serve others,

Eyes to see their pain,

Ears to hear their needs,

Mouths to teach His doctrine,

And hearts to feel His love.

We are made

For wise 

And wonderful things.

We are here

Through the trials,

Heartaches and sorrows,

To find our faith,

To find our trust,

To find our joy.

To learn

How to return back home,

To Him.

The Storms of Life

“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” 
― Haruki Murakami -

I read this the other day and was so overwhelmed with short bit of wisdom that I found here.  My life, for the  past year, has been filled with seemingly one storm after another.  There was a time, when I wasn't sure what would happen, or how I would handle it.  But I am making it through, I am surviving, and I am not the same person that I used to be.
I am working on the person that I want to become.  The Lord gives us understanding as we struggle through, line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little.  As we grow in understanding, we become more  like Him.  All the trials and the problems in life help us to grow, to learn and to become.

Sabbath Day Scribblings - Trials

“Anxiously you ask, 'Is there a way to safety? Can someone guide me? Is there an escape from threatened destruction?' The answer is a resounding yes! I counsel you: Look to the lighthouse of the Lord. There is no fog so dense, no night so dark, no gale so strong, no mariner so lost but what its beacon light can rescue. It beckons through the storms of life. It calls, 'This way to safety; this way to home.” 

― Thomas S. Monson - 

5 minute Friday - Cherished

Five Minute Friday: Cherished

Around here we write for five minutes flat on Fridays.

We write because we love words and the relief it is to just write them without worrying if they’re just right or not. So we take five minutes on Friday and write like we used to finger paint. For joy in the process. No matter how messy the result.

Got five minutes? Come and write with us! 

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking
2. Link back here at Lisa Jo's and invite others to join in.
3. Please visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. That is like the one rule we all really care about. For reals.

OK, are you ready? I’ve had this word in my own heart all week. Usually I’m wondering what the prompt will be and whether or not I will find the meaning in my own life.  But this week, this one is just perfect.  This week I think I needed this one word…

Cherished…

:GO

It is hard to push the keys on the computer.  Last Friday, I learned what cherish really means.  I learned that love is more than a thought and a word.  I learned that I have to be served sometimes.  No, I need to be served sometimes.  And love is the result of cherished service.  

Last week.  I broke my arm.  I slipped on some ice and fell on my elbow.  I knew it was broken as soon as I felt pieces in me move differently than they should.  My daughter and her friend went and got the first aid box from the car and splinted my arm.  I talked (or groaned) them through it.  

My husband came and got me, took me home to change into pj bottoms and bring extra clothes as I know they would be cutting the shirts off me.  He had to help me to the bathroom, collect my things and dress me.  Then we had an hour drive to the hospital.  Once there, we discovered that my elbow would need surgery and that I would have to be flown on a helicopter to the valley where I could get the care I needed.  He could not go with me, so he would need to drive three more hours to join me there.  

My son met me at he hospital and stayed until John could get down.  The day was filled with pain and surgery was a relief.  

Throughout all this, I have come to realize how much I am cherished.  My husband slept in a chair to be with me for two nights.  He has cared for me and watched over me for a week now.  He fixes meals, feeds me, helps bathe me, and is there for me through all of this.  My grown children have made sure that I know I am cherished and loved in each of their lives.

For me, cherished is being beside me through all of it.  The hard times, the rich times, the anguish and the aching.  Being cherished is holding on through the tough times, as well as the good.  It is knowing that I am more than the trial.  I am more than the pain.  I am loved.  I am cared for.  I am cherished.  

STOP

Tender Mercies - Faith

"Be aware that faith is not a free gift given without thought, desire or effort....The Savior said, "Come unto me" and "Knock, and it shall be [given] you".  These are action verbs- come, knock.  They are choices.  So I say, choose faith."  Richard C. Edgley

I read this today and it made me think about my own faith.  Sometimes I know that I want the Savior to come to me.  I want Him to make the decision and take it out of my hands.  Sometimes, I don't want to be the one making the choices.  I just want them made for me.  I just want to know that maybe I am doing it right after all.  I want someone to tell me that I am good.  That I am where I should be.  That I am doing what He wants me to do.  I want Him to come to me so that I don't have to risk choosing unwisely. 
The internal me, the thinking me, the one who knows better, understands that He does not do it for me.  He does not come to me without my first asking it of Him.  He stands at the door and knocks.  There is no handle on His side.  He does not come busting in, like the hero in one of my favorite fantasy tales, He does not save me, at the last second, from the villians of my life. 
But I have learned that, whenever a trial is given, whenever my heart is aching, whenever I think I have failed, there is a blessing hidden in the sorrow.  He stands with me through it all.  He never leaves my aching.  He waits for me to ask Him in for the healing to begin.  I must be the one to turn the knob and open the door toward Him.  I must make the effort to invite and welcome Him into my home and my heart.  He loves me, He is waiting, but the choice is mine.