We have had a unique experience in the last few weeks. There have been times in my marriage when I have felt as if I am the one that must lead us all. I have struggled with this, prayed about it, worked at it, and nothing has changed, until now.
Our family was asked to give talks in church a couple of weeks ago. We were only given less than one week to prepare. My husband decided that the best way to prepare was to listen to the Book of Mormon, from cover to cover, each day. He made it through the entire book one time, and about a third of the way through the second time. He was able to give a fifteen minute talk during church.
For anyone who knows my husband, he has never spoken longer than five minutes in any church meeting. He does not like talking. He does not like trying to prepare. This time, the scriptures made the difference. He was able to prepare and write down his entire talk and give it without fear. He was able to feel the spirit directing his life and those who were listening were able to feel it also.
The only thing that he did different this time was to read and study the scriptures. It has been an amazing journey to see his confidence and abilities increase as he has learned to rely more and more upon the Lord in his life. I am left feeling like I need to do more also before he leaves me behind!
President James E. Faust testified:
"Some time ago in South America, a seasoned group of outstanding missionaries was asked, "What is the greatest need in the world?" One wisely responded, "Is not the greatest need in all of the world for every person to have a persona, ongoing, daily, continuing relationship with Deity?" Having such a relationship can unchain the divinity within us, and nothing can make a greater difference in our lives as we come to know and understand our divine relationship with God and His Beloved Son, our Master. (James E. Faust, "That We Might Know Thee," Ensign, Jan. 1999, 2)"Heart-deep and soul-deep change does not happen until we turn our lives to our Savior. If you are struggling to become someone different, may I suggest that you turn your heart to the Scriptures. That you develop a personal relationship with our Lord and Savior, even Jesus Christ. The writings in the scriptures will bring you closer to Him and more able to walk in His ways.
In the past two weeks, I have seen a change in the dynamics of my family. I have seen a father lead and direct with love and compassion. I have heard his testimony and felt his love. I have seen his self-confidence increase and his ability to communicate come easier. I am amazed at the changes that are happening with just the increased desire to read and liken the scriptures unto us.
May you find yourself closer to Him this week as you study, ponder and pray.