For my 31 days of writing, I am linking up over at Heading Home and over at the Nester. There are several of us that are taking the 31 day writing challenge. Kate has suggested that we spend 31 days of Five minute writing. You can use the prompts or write about anything you would like, you just need to write.
I am sharing my journey for 31 days as I strive to become more like Him. My prayer is that you can find hope and peace in my words.
It isn't what you look at that matters,
It is what you see.
All my life, I have heard the saying, "seeing through rose-colored glasses", I never really understood that, my problem is more that the glasses I am looking through are dark and smudged. They see the endless trails instead of the eternity of possibilities.
I am trying to change. As I think of becoming more like Him, I can't imagine that He only looks at my sins. I don't think He focuses on what is always wrong. I somehow think that He is willing to forgive my many faults and look past them as I struggle to move forward and past those things myself.
And so, I have to ask myself, when He really looks at me, what does He see. I am pretty sure that He sees me so much differently than I do. I focus on the dark places, the blackness, the depression, the anxiety and the mistakes. I focus on the could have's and the should have's. I am not very gentle with myself.
Last week, I got to paint for the first time in years and something really stood out at me after we were through. We started with a white canvas and painted it all black. We needed the black in order to recognize and appreciate the colors that we going to be placed on top. When I finished, the picture isn't black at all. The trees are white, the foliage is orange and red and yellow and green. There is a darkness looking under the trees as if it is coming onto twilight. But it is not simply black.
Perhaps, I need to see myself like I see my art. I need to realize that I am only focusing on one part of my life. In the tapestry that weaves my life together, there are darks and lights all worked into the weaving. You really can't have one without the other. They bring about beauty in the world around us.
Perhaps I need to learn to open my heart and see with His eyes instead of my own; to feel with His love instead of my pain, To find my heart beating in rhythm with His. I think it is time to find His version of "rose-colored glasses".