I spent so much of my life, wanting, no needing to be better. It seems as if I always thought I wasn't good enough. I wasn't pretty enough. I wasn't like others enough. I wasn't clean enough. I wasn't spiritual enough. I wasn't ever enough. I did not understand what was wrong with me. Why others did not like me. Why I was so alone.
That feeling, that question, has lingered most of my life. I am sure that I have asked my Heavenly Father way too many times, "What is wrong with me? Why am I not the person that they want?"
I have been on this lifelong quest to find the reason, the flaw, the thing about me that’s wrong. I tell myself that if only I fix the mistakes, then I can change the person that I am. I could become that woman that others want me to be.
The question is wrong.
The question that I’ve been asking God and everyone else throughout my life, is not the right question. It is the same question you might have been asking too, whenever something goes wrong in your life. Whenever you hoped for a different outcome. Whenever you wanted something different than you received.
We have to stop asking that question. We have to stop wishing that we were someone else, someone new, someone different, someone not ourselves.
But the only answer, God's answer, is His whispers to stop asking. He wrote the scriptures for me. To show me the person that I need to be. His words tell me that I am beautiful. He made me. I am loved. I am not forgotten. I am enough.
Those answers are not the answer to my question. But they are the RIGHT answers. They are the answer to the only question that matters. The question that I did NOT ask. The question that I should have asked.
Who Am I?
May we each come to know that answer. That we are children of a loving Heavenly Father. That He loves us and we love Him. That His way is the only way that is sure. That His path is the only one that we need to follow. And that through our lives and our deeds, those around us may also come to know Him and see who they are and may come even nearer unto Him.
It was George Bernard Shaw who said, “If we all realized that we were the children of one father, we would stop shouting at each other as much as we do.”
Psalm 30:5 For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.