Is this what I really wanted???

Well, most of you know that I have been dieting like crazy and managing to lose some weight.  It is ALL about starvation, and no fast food!  Seriously, this is the hardest thing that I have ever done.  I am doing it for myself;  no one else has asked me to or even encouraged me too much in this endeavor.  As a matter of fact, when I make an observation to my husband, (you know the kind), like "does it look like I am losing weight yet?  He just looks at me over the tops of his glasses and simply says, "You look fine to me".

Seriously????  Fine????  Here I am, giving up all my favorite foods and I only look "fine"?

Weight loss can be so frustrating!  This is such a long process.  I have been doing it for just over two and a half months now.  I have lost 25 lbs, (that is FIVE bags of sugar I might add), but I still have so far to go.  I never thought that losing all that "baby fat" would be so difficult.  I am not sure what I thought actually.  I had so many excuses about why I wasn't losing any weight right now, that I failed to focus on what I could do in order to slowly lose the weight I wanted.  Instead of looking at short-term milestones, I focused so far in the future that I never had the strength to start at the beginning.  I think that I had decided I would lose weight after I was 90 (or 100) and certainly not until chocolate did not taste so good anymore.
Instead, here I am.  Middle aged, overweight, under-exercised, and well on my way to who knows how many diseases.  My knees creek, my belly bulges, and I have no muscles anywhere.  I am not sure what made me decide to do something about it.  I only know that I have several close friends who have recently lost several sizes and have managed to keep it off.  I finally allowed myself to be talked into doing it because I really want to succeed at this one area of my life.

From the very beginning, my husband has not wanted me to do this.  He likes the shape I am in, (round is a shape, right?).  He loves to cook and enjoys sharing his many culinary marvels with me.  I must admit that I have been way too spoiled!  He makes the best homemade bread and pasta dishes around.  And we are not even going to TALK about the cheesecake!  Now that I am on a serious diet, the only things he cooks that I can eat are grilled meats and vegetables.  The vegetables are not his favorite thing to make.

The same things that I love about him when I am fat, are the things that drive me crazy about him now!  He thinks I look fine just the way I am.  He thinks that I don't need to do this.  He thinks I should be happy with the body I have been blessed with and not keep wanting one that I haven't got.

When all is said and done though, I need to lose this weight for me, and that is probably what is making the difference.  I am not losing it for anyone else.  I have to stay focused in order to succeed, and most of all, I know that this crazy husband of mine will love me whatever the shape I am in!  (That includes the newer, skinnier model that I am working toward).

We should all have goals for ourselves.  Things we do for no one else.  Oh, don't get me wrong, others might benefit from them, but they should predominately be our dreams, our desires, our goals.   Success comes after we have made the decision to change.  It comes after the work, the sweat and the tears.  Success comes after the trial.  In my case, success comes after I give up the desserts.  It comes after I give up the food that I love.  For me, it comes after I change. 

Almost half-way there!!!!

five bags of sugar lighter than before!

"Unless you change how you are, you will always have what you've got".  Jim Rohn  

(And you might even have a little something extra!)