Seeking God

"Think of the purest, most all-consuming love you can imagine. Now multiply that love by an infinite amount—that is the measure of God's love for you.

I am especially grateful for the love of my Heavenly Father at this time in my life.  Sometimes, the trials in life can overwhelm you.  At least, it can seem that way.  Such has been the past couple of weeks in the progression of my family.  One of my children has been very ill.  He was in the hospital with kidney failure.  I was pretty surprised that this was a problem for him.  The entire family knows that he has other health problems, but this is not one we were expecting to face.  This year, has been a very tough one for him.  It seems as if he starts to improve and just gets his feet under him and something else happens.  He is now seeing three different specialists, for three different problems.
We are not sure why he is having such a hard time.  He has decided that it is my fault he is sick.  After all, it is my family that seems to have the same illnesses somewhere in the genes.  All I know is that I would rather it were me in that situation.  It is hard to watch one of your children go through these trials.  It is hard to see them suffer, and it is especially hard to have them question what is happening and why.
I am not sure why this trial is necessary.  I am not sure what I need to learn from it, or what he needs to learn.  But I know that when his brother laid his hands upon his head and gave him a blessing, I felt the spirit there.  I know of a surety that God loves this young man and that He is mindful of the challenges and trials that must be faced.  I also know that the Lord has seen fit to bring a healing and a blessing into his life at this time.
In my search for answers in the past couple of weeks, I have learned what a marvelous part of the body the kidneys are, and what a great function they perform for us.  Imagine, the purpose of these two small organs is to take toxins in the body and filter them out of the body.  They have a very necessary function.  Think of all the things you eat daily.  The soda, candy, sweets, salts and all kinds of nameless other things that are not good for you.  All those are toxins that your body needs to get rid of.  Our kidneys have a very important part to play in keeping us alive.  When they are working properly, we feel better!  When they are not working properly, all kinds of things in our bodies don't work properly either, and we get very ill and can even die if the toxins are not removed.
The interesting thing this week, was to see all of my adult children that were willing to be tested if needed in order to donate one of their kidneys so that their brother could have a happy and productive life.  I am filled with so much love for my children who look out for each other, care for each other, and are willing to suffer for each other.  I can't even begin to describe the love that I feel for each one of them.  I do not think that there was a single one of his siblings unwilling to do whatever was needed to save their brother's life.   He also has cousins that were willing and ready to step in and volunteer if they were needed.
I am surrounded by love.  I am held constantly in it's grasp.  I know what it looks like, feels like, and is.  I am so grateful this week for my wonderful family who has again taught me how much our Heavenly Father loves each one of us.  I am so grateful for their willingness to serve their brother, and to pitch in and help in whatever way was needed.  The more I experience love the more I feel closer to my Heavenly Father.  He cares for each one of us even when we are not sure that we care for ourselves.    May we strive always to seek Him and draw closer to Him as we struggle through our trials.  Often, I find Him the easiest in the midst of my trials.  I know that no matter how distant He seems, if we seek Him, we will find Him all around us.  His love is wrapped around us and He bears our burdens with us.  We are never alone.

"God does not look on the outward appearance (see 1 Samuel 16:7). I believe that He doesn't care one bit if we live in a castle or a cottage, if we are handsome or homely, if we are famous or forgotten. Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He love us perfectly, Though we may feel lost and without compass, God's love encompasses us completely.
Since 'God is love' (1 John 4:8), the closer we approach Him, the more profoundly we experience love. But because a veil separates this mortality from our heavenly home, we must seek in the Spirit that which is imperceptible to mortal eyes.  "Heaven may seem distant at times, but the scriptures offer hope: 'Ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart' (Jeremiah 29:13)."
Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "The Love of God," Ensign, Nov. 2009, 23