When faced with life's challenges,
it is Important to Remember
that although Daniel was saved from the lions,
he was not saved from the Lion's Den.

Friday, February 3, 2017

It Starts With You

Image result for happiness quotes
This one is hard for me to remember.  Sometimes, I feel like it is Someone Else's responsibility to make sure I am happy.  My head knows that is wrong, but my heart wants it to be true. 
I found a great quote yesterday that says:  "Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they never stopped to enjoy it!" 
That is very much me.  I don't stop and smell the roses as my husband would tell me.  I just kind of go along trying and failing to get everything done and make everyone else happy.  It hurts me when I can't make it happen!  I get so busy with everyone else, that I forget to take the time that I need for me.  
Fighting depression and anxiety is a constant struggle.  I want so much to BE happy, but I go about it in all the wrong ways.  I spend way too much time working and surviving and not nearly enough time sitting back and enjoying.  I focus on the getting there, instead of on the journey itself.
I think maybe, my priorities for happiness are just a little bit (OK, maybe a lot), mixed up.  I forget how things don't make us happy.  It really is about what I am feeling inside, and when I am too tired to even enjoy the fruits of my labors, how can I ever think to find happiness.  
So, here I am, taking a deep breath and moving on.  
Happiness seems so elusive when we are getting down and dirty with life.  Just when it seems that I will move forward, I sink into a hidden puddle and end up sliding back.  Life is unpredictable.  It is hard.  It is lonely, it is rough and rowdy and really, really messy.   But I also know that it is possible find those little, sparkling gems of happiness in the middle of the mud. 
I have to find them inside myself first.     It sounds so simple, but is in reality pretty hard.  I have to look past the darkness and find those bits and pieces that can bring me joy.  I have to live in the present moment, instead of the future and the past.  I have to let go and trust that everything is in His hands and that He has my back. 
I have to believe that I am lovable and worth loving.  I have to believe that I am worth some tiny spark of happiness.  I have to believe that there is good within myself. 
I have to take time and make time to be happy.      

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