I've got 99 problems,
and 86 of them
are completely made up scenarios
in my head that I'm stressing about
for no logical reason!
After going through the past couple of weeks with animal injuries and Kitty dying, I am learning a lot about problems in general. I tend to be a worrier. I worry about all the things that might happen, all the things that could possibly happen and all the worst case scenarios that I can imagine. This is exhausting.
I am good in an emergency. I can deal with blood and guts and screaming and crying with no problem. It is before the emergency (or even after) that I am not so good. I love the above quote, because in my case it is totally true. I completely make up the worst scenarios in my head, you know, the ones that could never happen.
The problem with that is that when something does happen, I am not prepared because it is not one of my own scenarios!
Take our poor dog Gracie. She was attacked by a black lab about too weeks ago. The lab did a lot of damage (600.00 at the vet). She had cuts that took many stitches to fix up. She had wounds to her abdomen and her chest. However, Gracie never worries.
Oh, she did attach herself to us a little extra careful for a few days, but now that the cone of shame is gone, the stitches are out, and she is feeling better, she is right back to barking and running and just loving everyone.
Now, I know that Gracie is just a dog, but she is teaching me an important lesson. She is teaching me how to live with every fibre of her little being. She romps and plays and loves and sometimes even drives us slightly crazy, but she lives in the moment. She loves in the moment. And if you scratch her ears, she lives for all the attention that you are willing to give her right now.
Maybe, just maybe, I need to learn to let go to the 86 made up problems that I am stressing about and just learn to let them go right into God's hands. My own "cone of shame" seems to be my willingness to get sucked into the stress. Maybe it is time to take it off and let it go. I need to trust that this moment, is the one I am supposed to be living in. I need to learn to have a little bit of faith in His timing.